Chapter 35: Picnic
Chapter 35: Picnic
Translator: SupremeTentacle
“Yay! It’s picnic time! We’re gonna have a picnic!”
Illuna spoke in a sing-songy tone as she happily skipped through the grassy field beneath her. She swung her arms about as she did, dragging both Lefi’s hand and my own all over the place.
The young vampire was beaming. Though, that wasn’t really saying much, seeing as how she was more or less always beaming. Her cheerful smile had long become one of her defining features. Today, however, she somehow managed to make said smile seem even more gleeful than usual. Seeing her like that reminded me of a certain school idol and the catchphrase she’d always pair with a smile. What was it again? Nico Nico Nii? [1]
“I know you are excited, Illuna, but it would be best for you to stop fidgeting. You are sure to tucker yourself out lest you cease,” said Lefi.
“But we’re going on a picnic! How can I not be excited? Doesn’t it just sound like so much fun!?”
“I know not what a picnic is. I recall little besides that I was suddenly awoken for it.”
Lefi squeezed her words out between a few tired-sounding yawns. Being as lazy as she was, she normally would have preferred to sleep in.
“Uhmmm, well, a picnic is…Uhmm… it’s like when you…”
Illuna tilted her head to one side as she attempted to recall my explanation.
“I forgot,” she said with an innocent smile. “What was it again?”
“Picnics are when you go outside with a bunch of people, eat stuff, and play around until you drop, all under a beautiful blue sky,” I explained. Man, I know I’m rarely ever swamped with work, but it still does feel nice to just cut loose and just totally relax. I mean, I did put in a slight bit more effort lately, so this break is totally well deserved.
“A beautiful blue sky…?” Lefi rolled her eyes. “This backdrop is but a blatant forgery, is it not?”
“Oh shut up Lefi,” I groaned. “Look, you’re right, but lay off. It doesn’t really matter if the sky’s real or not. It’s all about the mood.”
“Uhm, Master, I love playing around as much as the next gal, but there ain’t really anything to do here. All I see is an empty field of grass. Though, I guess it does kinda look like a good place to take a nap,” said Lyuu.
She was standing behind us so I couldn’t actually see her, but I was certain that she’d been looking in an attempt to find whatever was supposed to entertain us for the rest of the outing.
Speaking of which, our group was structured as follows: Lefi and I were taking up the lead, with Illuna between us, holding both our hands. Leila was right behind the three of us, quietly following along as she maintained her ever-composed expression and held onto the basket that contained our lunches.
Behind Leila was Shii, sitting atop an unamused looking Rir. I hadn’t seen Rir around too often lately and today served to prove exactly why that was the case. Lyuu was following him around and attempting to pamper him. She clearly thought she was doing him a service, but the fenrir couldn’t seem to think of her actions as anything but annoying.
“N nap? That does sound like a rather pleasant proposition,” Lefi yawned yet again as she scanned the field for a place to sleep.
“No napping,” I said. “Look, I know you’re probably thinking that there isn’t anything to do, but there is. Just trust me. I’ve made some pretty sweet plans for us. Speaking of which, that’s the spot I was looking for right over there.”
I pointed towards a small hill. Like the rest of the field, it was covered with grass. Its only defining feature was the creek that lay beside it. I created the hill just several days prior, specifically so that we could use it for today’s events. It felt as if I was no longer using the plains for the purpose I had originally intended them for, but I didn’t particularly mind.
Upon reaching our destination, I pulled a picnic blanket out from my item box and placed it on top of a patch of grass a bit away from the bottom of the hill.
“Is this where you plan for us to eat?” asked Leila.
“Later, yeah. I’m just setting it up right now so we have a place to sit. Feel free to set everything down here too. It should be far enough out of the way not to get plowed over.”
I reached into my item box and pulled out a wooden sled as I spoke. It was one of the larger models and could clearly fit two adults without discomfort. The sled’s bottom was flat and had a bit of a glossy sheen to it, perhaps because it was laminated. It looked like it would have no problems going down the hill despite it being grassy.
“What’s that thing for?” asked our resident vampire.
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“It’s a fun toy. Follow me, I’ll show you how to use it.”
I led Illuna atop the hill and sat her down in the sled. Rather than immediately getting on it myself, I stood behind it and positioned myself to push it.
“Are you ready?”
“Yup!”
“Then let’s go!”
I kicked off the ground and began pushing the sled downhill to give it an initial burst of speed then hopped in. The weight of my body suddenly falling onto the wooden vehicle gave it something along the lines of a second wind, accelerating it even further.
“Wow! We’re going so fast!”
Riding the sled gave me a bit of a rush, a thrill similar yet different from the one I got from flying. Flying was more demanding, but at the same time, it provided more control. Sledding was the opposite. All I had to do was lean back and let gravity do most of the work for me.
We rushed down the hill then slowly decelerated until we finally stopped right around where Lefi, Rir and the maids were gathered.
“You were right! That really was super fun!”
“Told you so. You see, this is clearly why I’m the master of all things fun. If you’re ever bored, then come to me and I’ll fix everything right up.”
“Mhm! You’re totally awesome!”
Though I was acting smug, I knew that I didn’t deserve any sort of title. All I was doing was borrowing existing ideas.
“Wow, Master. I hafta say, that looks really fun,” said Lyuu, her eyes sparkling.
“So you are using the hill itself as a toy? While the idea is fundamentally quite simple, it appears interesting nonetheless,” added Leila.
“You guys want to give it a shot?”
“You betcha!”
“I would love to, but is it really okay for me to join you in your leisures, my Lord?”
“Of course.”
And so, I went back up the hill with the two maids. Lyuu was really excited, so she ended up taking the front seat. Leila sat in the back while I stood behind them in order to give the sled the push it needed to get going.
“Uhhh… wow Leila. Your boobs sure are big…” muttered Lyuu, under her breath.
“Come again?” said Leila.
“You know what, it’s nuthin’. Just do me a good one and pretend ya didn’t hear it, ‘kay? I’d rather not start feelin’ even more sorry for myself.”
“Hm?”
The energy and excitement seemed to drain from Lyuu’s body as she came into contact with Leila’s bountiful bosom. Her face warped a bit, as if to show that she was dealing with all sorts of conflicting emotions. I almost started to feel sorry for her, but instead ended up stifling a laugh as I recalled a certain character stating proclaiming being flat chested was a status symbol. [2]
“Hey Master, why’s it look like you’re tryin’ ta stop yourself from gigglin’ or somethin’?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. Now let’s go,” I said, as I began pushing the sled.
“Hey wait, answer my question first! Wa-wait, I said waitttttt!”
I ignored her and began pushing the sled with all the power my body could muster. And as I was a Demon Lord, it went without saying that they ended up gaining quite a good bit of speed. That is, they went so fast I’d almost thought that the sled had rocket-powered boosters attached to it.
“Hoooooly crap, that was way faster than I thought it’d be…Y-You’re really strong, Master… We accelerated so quickly that my thighs ended up jerkin’ up and stuff…” Lyuu paused a bit after each sentence in order to take a deep breath.
“That was incredible. I presume that I should not have expected anything less from a Demon Lord, though,” said Leila.
She was calm now, but even the ever-composed Leila had ended up leaking a shout of surprise when the sled first picked up speed. I was a bit curious about her expectations, but ended up shelving the thought for the time being. I instead glanced at the one person that had yet to experience sledding down Demon Lord Hill.
“Well Lefi, you’re next.”
“I-I would not mind yielding my turn to another.”
“Oh come on, don’t say that. Just try it. I’m sure you’ll enjoy it.”
Lefi seemed a bit reluctant to join in on the fun, so I bent down, stuck my head between her legs, grabbed them, and lifted her as I stood back up. In other words, I began giving her an over-the-shoulder piggyback ride.
“W-What are you doing!?”
“Being inclusive. I’d totally feel bad for you if you were the only person left out of the fun.”
I tightened my grip on her legs to ensure that she wouldn’t be able to escape and forced her up the hill with sled in tow.
“I-I understand! I shall ride that damned sled of yours, so cease this immediately! Put me down!” The dragon began shouting in panic. “Stop this! Stop it now! Wait! Wait!? What manner of insanity is this!? Yuki!? Heed my words and cease this immediately! Yuki!!”
“Don’t worry, Lefi. I know that a Supreme Dragon like you couldn’t enjoy a regular sled ride, so I made sure to get something special ready for you. Hold on tight. You might fall off if you don’t.”
I positioned the sled such that it was facing down the hill and got on with her still attached to my shoulders.
“Y-you have got to be kidding meeeeeee!?”
I wasn’t able to dash to give myself a boost this time around, so I instead used wind magic, which I conveniently just happened to learn how to use just a few days ago.
“Mwahahaha!”
I laughed in a manner befitting a Demon Lord as an explosive amount of force suddenly smashed into the sled, accelerating it to its highest speed to date.
“What was that!? I’m certain we were lifted off the ground!”
“God damn! That was awesome! I can see another bump right over there. What do you say to round 2?”
“I would very much like to sit out. Wait. Yuki? I’m beggiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!”
The wind had been completely knocked out of Lefi’s lungs by the time we hit the bottom of the hill. She almost looked like she was on the verge of hyperventilating.
“D-Damn you…” she complained. “You went far too fast, and intentionally, at that!”
“Don’t you normally go way faster when you’re flying anyway?”
“Flying and sledding are not in any which way the same experience!”
I wasn’t going to openly admit it, but I understood exactly where she was coming from. In my previous life, I had a friend explain a similar concept to me. He was perfectly fine with bungee jumping. In fact, he loved it. However, he couldn’t stand drop towers or any other rides that effectively involved freefalling. That is, he only enjoyed falling when he felt that he was in control. Lefi seemed to be the same, she couldn’t tolerate high speeds unless they were brought about by her own actions.
“I clearly had the wrong idea here. I should have been worrying about your fears instead of worrying about you feeling left out, huh? Who would’ve thought that the supposed oh so mighty supreme dragon wouldn’t even be able handle a children’s game?”
“Ugh…”
Lefi groaned in response to my teasing. She stayed limp and lifeless for a few moments after, but then underwent a sudden change. I was expecting her to just sigh and get over it. But I was wrong.
A fearless grin had made itself onto her face.
“Reflecting upon it has led to to a realization, Yuki. I now believe that in truth, I did enjoy the experience. In fact, I enjoyed to such an extent that I would very much like to repeat it. What say you to joining me on another ride?”
The way her eyes shone signaled that it was time for me to back off.
“I uh… just went. It wouldn’t be fair for me to go twice in a row, so I think I’ll let someone else take my place.”
But I wasn’t allowed to escape.
“Do not say that. I am certain that it is an experience you will enjoy.”
She paraphrased the words I’d said to her a few minutes earlier and threw them right back to me as she got off my shoulders and wrapped both her arms around me from behind. Her grip was tight; she was using far too much of her strength for me to escape.
“Damn it Lefi, you’re embarrassing me. Could you save the cuddles for when we’re in private?”
“Embarrassed? Have we not already bathed together? What more is there to be embarrassed about?”
Lefi materialized her wings and brought both the sled and I back atop the hill.
“You know what? Fine, bring it on. I love thrill rides, and the hill’s not even that tall. I’ll end up enjoying the hell out of this regardless of how fast you make me go.”
“And what, precisely made you think that you would be using the hill? I will instead be preparing a special track, one designed entirely for your sake.”
“Wait, what!?”
“You provided me special treatment. It is only fair that I reciprocate it, is it not?”
The ground began to rumble as the supreme dragon drew a horizontal line through the air with one of her arms.
“The heck is that!?”
A massive glacial structure containing twists, turns, loops, and vertical plunges emerged from the earth. It was a veritable roller coaster track, one that even came equipped with guardrails that prevented any potential riders from falling off.
“Are you really going to sled through all that, Yuki? Wow! You’re so cool!”
“Whew… I gots to say, that looks like way too much for lil’ old me to handle.”
“What an intricate spell. I almost cannot believe it took her only a second to craft such a massive track.”
The peanut gallery began commenting as if this whole ordeal was none of their business.
“That thing’s way out of scale no matter how you look at it! How the hell’s a sled even supposed to make it all the way through!?”
“Worry not. You have always seen to my needs and provided me with the care I required. And now that it has come time for me to reciprocate it, you can trust that I will do the same. I will be accelerating you through the use of wind magic. Needless to say, your speed will far surpass the speed you had brought me to only moments prior.”
“That sounds like an awful idea though!?”
“Now go! And forget not your resolve, for you will require a force of will akin to that of a man confronting his demise!”
“That’s not something I waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!”
Lefi pettily began accelerating me with magic before I could even finish voicing my complaints.
“Hahahaha!” She cackled. “Know my wrath! Suffer the weight of my resentment!”
“God damn iiiiiiiiiiiiiiit!!!!”
[1] Love live reference.
[2] Lucky star reference.