Chapter 476 Diary - I
To me, diaries have always been objects devoid of significance. Yet, in anticipation of the pivotal moments ahead and to ensure that my thoughts remain lucid and flawless over the next three years, I find myself compelled to document my experiences.
Thus, I commence anew, reevaluating my relationship with Ansel… from the beginning.
*
Imperial Calendar, March 1st, Year 1104.
Ansel and I met in the capital's Iris Square. It was our first encounter, and I immediately sensed a chilling danger emanating from him.
— A creature of considerable mystery, having remained hidden for years. This was my initial impression of him.
Nonetheless, it mattered little to me, for Ansel possessed talents and capabilities far beyond my reach. Even if he approached with hostility, I was confident in my ability to make advantageous use of him.
March 18th.
More than two weeks had passed since my meeting with Ansel. Without a doubt… he is the most extraordinary genius this world has ever seen. I believe that in terms of pure innovation and intellect, he has already surpassed his father, Flamelle.
However, his presence is fraught with peril. In just seven days, our social distance had diminished to a mere ten centimeters. Despite my awareness of his ill intentions and my preparedness for caution, I failed to maintain an appropriate distance between us—a task at which I am inherently inept, and he, evidently, excels.
March 22nd.
Ansel, who knows me inside and out, began attempting to draw me closer. He claimed to possess a method to alter the current dire situation of the Tower of Babel, suggesting that I could be the one to save it… I was uncertain of his motives, but the bait was too tempting to resist.
March 25th.
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He presented me with a blueprint, asserting that the creation of this so-called "firearm" could be the salvation of the Tower of Babel.
It was a… revolutionary concept, not in terms of the difficulty of realizing firearms, but in the transcendence of thought. This thirteen-year-old boy appeared as an observer, overlooking this stagnant era, his gaze fixed on the distant unknown.
If such transcendence were not applied to violence, it would be ideal. Yet, the Tower of Babel and I are in need of this violence.
At this moment, I must admit, despite knowing his malicious intent, it is challenging to remain guarded and distant from him.
Ansel is a remarkable individual, but why would someone of his talent and capability, and a future divine being at that, harbor ill will towards me?
Perhaps an opportunity for probing his intentions is warranted.
March 27th.
I inquired whether I was worthy of becoming his pact head, to which he responded with a laugh of refusal.
I think I understand why he approached with malice... He does not trust me. He is aware of my nature and knows that I would never exalt him above all else.
So, is his goal to subjugate me?
Through… such means?
Despite his approach with malice, he employs such gentle tactics... What exactly is he contemplating? Regardless, this presents a key point that can be exploited.
April 3rd.
I am incapable of continuing.
Observing his animated demeanor as he discusses those matters with me, I find myself unable to… exploit his trust any further.
Regardless of his initial intentions, his current thoughts and words are undoubtedly sincere and truthful.
So, this is his purpose? He aims to sway me with his genuine heart.
If this continues, it seems I will be unable to reject him.
After all, Ansel and I are companions on this journey.
If Ansel's ultimate goal is also to transform this world, then making concessions is not out of the question, for he is more capable of realizing the vision my grandfather described.
No… it is too soon to conclude.
There are still mysteries surrounding Ansel.
Why did he choose me? If his initial intent was to tame me into a pact head, how did he pinpoint me, a person of no renown and no prior connections to him, amidst the vast throngs of people? I am confident in my abilities, but how did he discover me?
And why, as a divine species destined to dominate all, does he feel insecure?
He always seems uneasy, I can tell... just like me.
Perhaps initially, my ability to detect his concealed malice stemmed from this shared sentiment.
Like me, he is wary of everything around him, which is why I am accustomed to moving about in a puppet's body. But why would Ansel feel insecure?
What could possibly make a divine species feel insecure?
He harbors a significant secret, and for the future, I should continue to probe.
…No, no, you cannot, Ravenna.
He may have experienced a despair similar to yours, and while it might seem impossible for a divine species... what if? Knowing that you still refuse to recall your grandfather's death, how can you casually probe into Ansel's pain, however unlikely it may be?
His feelings towards you are genuine, Ravenna.
You should respect him.
April 4th.
He didn't provide a detailed concept for the data system, but it's alright, I can manage.
It is no longer he who assists me, but I who will assist him, and I will show him the world he envisions.
I will stand by him.
July 9th.
No... something is not right.
After our discussion about the data system and Ansel's designs, there seems to have been a change in him.
His passion for creation is rapidly waning, and his hope for change is vanishing at a rate I cannot comprehend; moreover, there seems to be a… burgeoning aversion?
I am not mistaken in my feelings; I know him too well.
After countless reviews of that day's conversation, I still cannot find the words that might have caused such a drastic change in Ansel. Could something terribly adverse have happened to him during this period?
If there was anything in my words that day that could have impacted Ansel, it would only be one phrase.
Only the phrase, "It is fate."
Fate...
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