Canon Fodder

CHAPTER 22 BELL PEPPERS AND BEEF

“What was your name?” Nami asked as we walked into the main living quarters. There was a small kitchen and dining area. A hall in the back looked to have doors for cabins and stairs that went to the lower deck for storage and perhaps a brig. 

“Weston D. Watanabe,” I said. “I uh haven’t eaten in a few days. You mind letting me raid your fridge?”

“If you can pay,” Nami said with a smile. 

“Only with my body,” I said. 

“Deal,” she retorted. “I’ll pay you 1 berrie an hour.”

“Come on,” I groaned. “Sanji would understand,” I mumbled the last part so they couldn’t hear me. 

“Yeah Nami, have a heart,” Usopp said. 

“I’m not cooking some stranger dinner when we barely have anything left after Luffy got up for a midnight feast,” Nami snapped. 

“I’ll cook,” I said. 

“You’re a cook?!” Luffy asked excitedly. 

“No,” I said quickly. “I cook well enough for a bachelor.” I walked over to the small fridge. Curious how it worked on a ship with no electricity I noticed it was actually an ice box. They had big chunks of dry ice in the top hatch. 

Looking through the food stored there was a lot of veggies, grains, some fruits, and a bunch of finger food. “Where’s the meat?!”

“Talk to the captain,” Nami said. “Hence our reluctance to make anything.”

Luffy laughed. “My stomach has a mind of its own.”

“It’s a mind that I want to kill,” Nami said. 

“Have to agree with you there,” Zoro grumbled. 

“Fine, bell peppers and beef it is,” I said. Digging through the food. 

“There’s beef?!” Luffy asked far too excitedly. 

“It’s a figure of speech,” I said. A reference to Cowboy Bebop when there was no meat to be had. “Luckily I lived with a vegan chick once. You start cutting the onion,” I said pointing at Usopp. 

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After Nami set course for the restaurant on the seas I started cooking a big meal for everyone. A conglomeration of all the veggies left in the pantry, it wasn’t pretty but my starving self didn’t care. 

“Yeah, you’re not a cook,” Luffy said with a grumble as he dug through the veggies. 

“Say thank you, you mannerless heathen,” Nami spat smacking him on the back of the head. 

“Thank you,” Luffy grumbled as he chewed on a bell pepper. 

“You’re welcome,” I said. “So who are you all?”

“Oh right, we didn’t introduce ourselves,” Usopp said. Johnny was off nursing Yosaku in one of the spare rooms. “I’m the mighty captain Usopp.”

“Oy, I’m the captain,” Luffy said. 

“You’re the captain?” I asked, hiding my smile. I was enjoying this way too much. “I noticed this is a pirate crew. How long have you been doing this?”

“A few weeks. I’m Monkey D. Luffy, I’m gonna be king of the pirates some day!”

“I am not a pirate,” Nami clarified. “These idiots happen to be going where I’m going. I’m Nami.”

“Zoro,” He said. 

“Pirate hunter Zoro?” I asked. 

“The same,” he said. 

“And how did you end up a pirate?”

“I’ve been wondering that myself,” he said then went back to eating. 

“What about you?” Nami asked. “What do you do? You said you were shipwrecked?”

“Me…I’m…a ninja,” I decided on. Nami rolled her eyes but Usopp and Luffy had stars in theirs. Zoro didn’t care. 

“Really?! Can you do a clone jutsu?!” Luffy asked. 

“No, that’s fake,” Usopp said. “Are you a master of disguise? Can you throw kunai and have a bunch of ninja stuff?”

“I don’t have any weapons on me,” I said. “I can throw kunai. And yeah I can do a clone jutsu.”

There was a longer stunned silence. “Bullshit,” Zoro scoffed. 

“You want to see?” I asked, a wide smile on my face. There were stars in Luffy’s eyes as he nodded quickly. Standing up I did the form and released my chakra. Smoke shot out from me and there were 2 of me. 

“Awesome!!!” Luffy said standing up. He jumped over and began poking the clone. 

“I can’t believe it,” Usopp said, joining him. 

“It’s-it’s an illusion,” Nami said, freaked out. “See, he’s not moving.” Both me and the clone looked at her. 

“This clone is very real” “I am very real.” We said. 

“You’re freaking me out,” Nami said. “That’s not possible.”

“It is,” I said. “I can do a lot of ninja stuff.” I released the clone. Disappearing out of thin air, Luffy and Usopp cried sadly as he disappeared. 

“That’s interesting,” Zoro said. “Can you both fight?”

“My clones can do a little. But hit them once and they disappear,” I said. 

“Teach me, teach me,” Usopp said. 

“I don’t know if I can,” I said. “I’m from… an ancient ninja clan… I think. I lost a lot of memories a while ago. But I know how to do all the secret techniques.”

“You’re a ninja that knows a bunch of killing moves but you don’t have any memories?” Nami asked. “That’s not possible.”

“I don’t know what to tell you,” I said truthfully. “It’s like I woke up a few months ago in East Blue. I had to beg my way on that ship that sank. I only know my name. And I look 18. I’m still figuring out all the interesting ninja moves I can do.”

“What else? What else? Show me!” Luffy asked excitedly. 

“I can walk on walls,” I said. Going to the wall I charged chakra in my feet and began walking up the wall. Then the ceiling. Hanging down from my feet as I stared at them. 

“So cool,” Luffy said. “Weston, you have to join my pirate crew.”

A tear came to my eye. I almost choked on the word, “okay.”

—-

“You sure adjust quickly,” Nami said. It was dark at that point. I was leaning on the rail at the back of the ship where her orange trees would reside some day. I wasn’t too surprised she was there. 

“What can I say? He’s going to be the Pirate King. Why wouldn’t I want to be in his crew?”

She scoffed. “You actually believe that crap?”

I frowned at her. “He doesn’t seem the lying type.”

“He doesn’t even know how to lie,” she laughed. “No, it’s an impossibility. Become the pirate king? There are so many stronger pirates out there. Disgusting…beings that would do anything. Lie, cheat, and kill so they don’t have to do an honest day's work.”

“Oh, and you do honest work?” I asked. 

She blushed. “W-what do you mean?”

“Nothing,” I said. “I mean, you’re a navigator for a pirate crew.”

“They are just going where I am,” she stammered. 

“Well I’ll miss you when you decide to leave,” I said. 

“You’re not actually staying are you?” She asked. 

“Duh, he’s going to be the pirate king,” I repeated.

“I really thought you were smarter,” she mumbled. 

“I’m not,” I said. “I’m a man with a dream, like Luffy.”

“What’s that?”

“Get my memories back,” I said without hesitation. My name was still Watanabe so I guessed I was related to Wano in some way. “If not that, then make some new ones.”

She didn’t have a response to that. We watched the ocean as the ship coasted. The night air cool, I decided to do my best to get her to stay. I knew she would, but it was worth a shot to not have such drama at her home. Would go a lot smoother to have her simply ask for help. 

“You know,” I said. Acting like I wasn’t talking to her. “Becoming the pirate king isn’t a one man crew job. You can’t become the best without having the best people around you. I’m guessing he could use a pretty great navigator to get across the world.”

I looked over to her. “If you’re not up for the job, I understand wanting to leave.” 

“Ha I’m the best navigator around,” she said. “Don’t think some simple reverse psychology would work on me either. This is a lost cause crew. There’s no pay. No benefits. No dental.”

“I don’t know. They’d probably fight your battles for you,” I said. That stopped her cocky attitude. “You know. If you had enemies to deal with.”

“Like they could,” she grumbled. 

“Don’t act so sure. If he’s going to become the pirate king. I’d assume any enemy his ally’s had would become his enemies. He’d be a poor excuse for a captain if he couldn’t help keep his crew safe,” I said. “I’m part of the crew. I’d be willing to help. I’m a ninja, remember? Who else is a better match for me than a cat burglar?”