Code Zulu Alpha: Nerd in the Apocalypse!

At this point in time, I wasn't able to resist these sorry fucks' puppy eyes but I did make everyone else prepare everything themselves without me touching a knife. Afterwards, I even assigned a random-ass citizen to make my own version of meat stew so they'd be able to make the meal without me.

Granted there should be slight differences from one recipe to the next, but to take some of the magic out, anything and everything should taste the same as long as the same ingredients, procedures, etc were followed.

Some say it was love but sometimes it was just lard.

But yeah, the only group who didn't come back from our trip outside was Oscar's but that was because it'd take several hours to go back and forth the Marine base and then to this one.

Bartow commented, "They'll probably get back here first thing in the morning."

I turned to him, "How were things on your end though?"

He just shrugged his shoulders, "Eh. Just killed anything that wasn't supposed to be alive. We'll send a crew to clean up—"

"Hold up. You just left the corpses there?"

"Yeah?"

"You've been here for at least two weeks, right?! You should've known what sneaks around these parts! You don't just focus on one thing, you kill, you loot, you stack, you burn! That's the way to go! You don't just have fun and have your servants do the dirty work—"

"Don't start again, you punk! We closed off the area, alright?! There are more bridges to close off—seven of them in total—and since you said you'd be opening up a new road, it's fine, right?! We gotta eat too!"

"Have you marked off the cleared buildings at least?"

"What?"

"That's a no."

"Mark off— The fuck are you talking about?!"

I closed my eyes before I deeply sighed, "Look. You're not the only ones here and I'm surprised that we haven't run into them yet. But the reason you mark off a cleared building and close it right after looting them or cataloging everything that's inside was to keep the dead and the living from wandering in and restarting what you've worked hard for."

"Why are you being this difficult?!"

"I'm not! It's standard procedure!"

Mitch chimed in, "They did clear all of the dead inside that sector, right? Take it like how you make some coffee… You can start with a tablespoon of coffee or a tablespoon of sugar but at the end, it still tastes the same alright? In this case, I would've been with you if the area they just cleared couldn't be closed off but it is, right?

There's no way those sneaky ones you spoke of could've made it through—"

Then I turned to Bartow again as I cut Mitch off:

"You checked the restrooms?"

"Yeah."

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"The female restrooms?"

"Of course—"

"You sick fuck."

"Haah?!"

"Just kidding, did you take the tissues, napkins, and tampons from the dispenser?"

"What? I told you we just cleared the dead, not loot—"

"Right. You mean to say if you find a gun on the pavement, you wouldn't take it?"

"Of course, I would! It's a fucking gun—"

"But napkins aren't a priority?"

"DON'T FUCKING COMPARE IT TO A FUCKING GUN! A GUN'S A GUN!"

"Eh. I just thought you Americans love tissues so fucking much. Gotten used to washing your ass with soap and water yet?"

"I'M STILL EATING, YOU PUNK!"

"Uh-huh. If you see a chunk of poop in there, you'd stop, right?"

"THE FUCK'S WRONG WITH YOU?! WHAT'S WITH THIS LINE OF QUESTIONING?! ARE WE STILL TALKING ABOUT THE RESIDENTIAL AREA UP NORTH?!"

"Now that you mention it, did you check the manholes? The ongoing construction site? The small prison from the precinct? The mall? The drainage channel? The schools?"

"We checked everything, alright?! We've been attracting the dead in one spot and taking care of everything!"

"..." I stopped talking as I looked at him with disappointment.

"WHAT?!"

I rolled my eyes, "I thought you cleared everything?"

"We did!"

"How come you cleared that space in a span of a day or two— no, a day and a half at most? That's just impossible. Did you really clear everything or just the streets and some interesting buildings? It's because those are totally different things."

Bartow then put his bowl down with a frown on his face, "Look here, punk. We know how to kill. That's where I'm the fucking best at. I may not be good at everything else but if my superiors tell me to raze a place to the ground I'll fucking do it—"

"I'm not questioning how brutal you could ravage a sack of flesh, I'm questioning if you got all of them, not most of them."

"The. Area. Is. Closed. Off."

"Still. Doesn't. Mean. Shit."

"THEN WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO SAY?!"

"Are you confident you could let a child play alone in that residential area without a biter chomping his head off?!"

"Y— I mean— Why would you leave a child alone?!"

"JUST ANSWER THE FUCKING QUESTION! IS IT THAT HARD?!"

"FINE! I WON'T!"

"FINALLY! SOME FUCKING HONESTY!"

"YOU'RE REALLY FUCKING BENT ON MAKING ME LOOK BAD, HUH?!"

"THE FUCK ARE YOU ON ABOUT?!"

"YOU GOT A LUCKY SHOT YESTERDAY, ALRIGHT?!"

"YOU'RE THE ONE WHO GOT A LUCKY SHOT! NO ONE COULD EVER FUCKING TOUCH ME WHEN I'M FOCUSING ON ONE THING! AND NO! YOU'RE THE ONE MAKING YOURSELF LOOK BAD! I WOULD'VE SUNG YOU FUCKING PRAISES IF YOU DID A JOB WELL DONE BUT YOU KEPT LYING ABOUT YOUR FUCKING ACCOMPLISHMENTS!"

"YOU KNOW JACK SHIT! WE NEED A WIN!"

"THEN FUCKING DO YOUR JOB PROPERLY! LYING ABOUT IT IS STILL NOT A WIN! CLOSING OFF AN AREA'S A WIN, LYING ABOUT CLEARING AN AREA ISN'T! WE OPENED UP A NEW PATH WHICH IS A WIN BUT WE DIDN'T EVEN SAY WE FULLY CLEARED THE AREA! IT'S JUST TWO DIFFERENT THINGS!"

"WHAT DO YOU KNOW?! WE'D CLEAR IT IF WE HAVE MORE TIME! IT'S JUST A MATTER OF—"

"THEN JUST FUCKING SAY SO, YOU NUMBNUT! WE COULD'VE HELPED YOU!"

"WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU EVEN HELP ME IF YOU'VE BEEN AGAINST ME SINCE DAY ONE?!"

"IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU, YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE! IT'S BECAUSE YOU JUST TOLD ME YOU NU— BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN WE COULDN'T HELP IN PICKING UP THE PIECES! WE CAN'T WORK TOGETHER IF WE'RE NOT ON THE SAME FUCKING PAGE!"

"WE'RE ON THE SAME FUCKING PAGE! AREN'T WE?!"

"ARE WE THOUGH?! DOES IT LOOK LIKE IT?!"

"Y— I DON'T FUCKING KNOW AT THIS POINT! WE JUST GOT HERE, YOU PUNK! BUT I THOUGHT WE WERE!"

"WE SHOULD BE! BUT NOT THIS FUCKING WAY!"

"..."

"..."

All of a sudden, the two of us just went quiet like everyone else listening in the conversation, but Bartow still angrily picked up his bowl and finished his meal while looking like he'd be the happiest guy alive if he got to choke me out.

But yeah, to be completely fair, both of our intentions were impossible at the moment because they really just couldn't clear that whole sector in two days and we didn't have enough wooden boards on hand to completely close off the buildings like we did near our territory.

There was just some fucking reason we were so fucking pissed at each other and like potassium's reaction in making contact with water— fuck it, lobbing a grenade into a gas station, we'd just blow up and cause chaos every time we see each other.

However, as we both set out for our own runs, we both used the North bridge we blocked so they could once again sweep the area with a fine-toothed comb while my group made use of kitchen tables or liberated tables from the inside to blockade the entrances and the exits from a few smaller buildings.

We can't just chop off trees and turn them into sizable and uniform planks—though that would've been nice—but we were doing what we could at the moment.

At one point, Bartow and I met at an intersection and I was surprised to see that he had a huge dump truck with a pile of random items he specifically didn't touch so I could rifle through them.

"Thanks."

"Yeah."

"Great job on sweeping the smaller buildings or houses first."

"Thanks for double-checking them before closing them off."

"Yeah. I'll give the list of items we left behind here to either Maine or Janice."

"Eh. Maine works better."

"True."

"..."

"..."

"We're gonna go this way."

"Us too."

"Don't fucking follow me, you punk."

"Who the hell would want to follow you, Mr. Sailor-man?!"

"DON'T START WITH ME WHILE WE'RE OUTSIDE, KID!"

"I DO IT OUT OF NECESSITY BECAUSE YOU ALREADY HAVE TWO STRIKES!"

"TWO?! WHAT DO YOU MEAN TWO?!"

"DO YOU WANT ME TO COUNT WAITING FOR ME TO COOK LUNCH?!"

"YOU DID NOTHING!"

"I HAVE A VERY GOOD ROLE MODEL!" I shouted while pointing right at him, "BUT AT LEAST I FINISHED WHAT I WAS SUPPOSED TO!"

Then Kaley roughly nudged my torso while Quinn kicked Bartow's calf:

"NOT HERE, DOOFUS!/ ALRIGHT, THIS IS ENOUGH!"

"WE'RE JUST TALKING!"

"NO, YOU AREN'T!"