Chapter 351 - I Cant
Some people were lucky enough to survive one coma, Lina survived two. And for the latter, she didn't think it was possible. What was the first thing she did when she woke up? Groan about the beeping machines.
"Ugh…" Lina's voice sounded foreign to her own years. She mumbled under her breath, turning over in her bed, only to freeze at how much her body was aching.
The memories came rushing back to her. Attending the movie premiere, the artist that shot Kaden, the woman that took the bullet for him. No wait, SHE was the one who did it.
Gasping, Lina sat upright. Before she could blink, a vision of black came out in front of her. She froze at the weight of a mountain embracing her tightly. He buried his face into her neck, a knee on the bed, and his lips upon her skin. She felt his body tremble, and wondered how such a thing could feel fear.
"You…" Lina licked her cracked lips. She was exhausted.
Lina felt like she slept for all of eternity. How long was she out for? She didn't remember much from her coma, except a few bickering, but most importantly, she recalled a hazy recollection of a strange dream. Was it her second life? She remembered the dazzling club opened by Isabelle, the spark-fueled romance of a merchant heiress and a military commander, and how everything fell to the ground.
"You big baby." Lina felt her hand slide up his large back. His hair tickled her jaw and she felt his grip grow stronger. If he squeezed her any harder, she'd shatter right in his arms.
"You reckless—"
"Big baby," Lina repeated, stroking his body.
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Lina missed the strength of his neverending embrace. She had lost count of how many times she'd close her eyes and feel her heart race. Sometime ago, she had forgotten what it was like to be held by him. What it was like to be loved by him. The comfort, the security… she had never felt more at home than in this hospital bed.
"I thought you died." Kaden's voice was a low and dangerous rumble.
When Kaden pulled away, Lina's chest tightened at his face. He was the thunder warning of a storm, unexpected yet terrifying. He was the sorrow of a rainfall drenching the body from head to toe. He was the iciness of a dead body buried seven feet under. He was everything that Lina shouldn't love, but her heart skipped.
"Never do that for me again," Kaden gritted out, holding onto her hands. He leaned close to her, right in front of her face.
"Never ever—"
"What if I said it was on instinct? What if I told you my body reacted on it's own before I could get it back?" Lina responded, offering him a pained smile. Was she the one to blame, when it was her love for him that drove her to react?
"You—" Kaden cut himself off. He sharply exhaled and glanced at the bed. With tugged brows, he debated how he should lecture her properly.
"You should wear my ring." Kaden rubbed his calloused thumb over her thin hands. She should dress up as a skeleton for Halloween. By now, one and a half of her feet were at the door of death. Any more and she'd be gone.
"No other jewel belongs on your hand more than my rubies," Kaden brought her hand to his lip. He kissed the spot where her wedding ring would've sat, a perfect red on her pale skin. He nuzzled her knuckle against his cheek, closing his eyes to savor the moment. He could feel her pulse and the warmth of her skin. She wasn't like this when she was in a coma.
"Is that all you want to say?" Lina genuinely asked, tilting her head in curiosity.
Kaden pulled away and glared down at her. He slid his hands up her elbow and to her shoulders, where he grabbed. He grabbed her closer, until she was forced to stare up at him. She had no choice, but to see the terror and anger in his dark eyes.
"If you had died…" Kaden gravely said, with a grim, yet infuriated expression. "If you…"
Kaden had so much to tell her. So many things to yell. She needed to be scolded. Loved. Hated. My god, he didn't know what to do with her. When she was in a coma, he practiced a thousand things to utter. Now that he had her wide awake, now that she was revealing her large brown eyes to him, his throat tightened. He lost all his thought process.
"If you had died in this lifetime, I would be suffering the rest of eternity without you. My immortality will force me to stay on this earth, and you will return to the skies with Atlantis… I would've lost you permanently."
Kaden hung his head in defeat. He pressed his forehead against hers, squeezing his eyes shut.
Lina's heart shattered for him. She felt the power and depth of his words. He was having difficulties showing his weaknesses. A masculine and aloof man like him was not used to revealing his deepest emotions. She caressed his upper arm, and felt his muscles tighten. He gritted his teeth, his jaw tightened.
"I can't lose you Lina, I-I just—I can't." Kaden was never the kind to stumble over his words. An overwhelming wave of emotions knocked him down. He shakily exhaled and kissed her gently.
"Lina, you're my everything. And without you, I don't think—no, I know this." Kaden swallowed hard. "I can't live for eternity without you by my side. I do not know what I will become without your laughter, your smile, and your presence. I do not know what I will do to this world."
Kaden's grip tightened on her shoulders. "You… you out of everyone must stay on this earth. I would want you by me, but you are a free bird and I was once a foolish man who dared to cut your wings. Please just live, Lina. That is all I ask of you."
If Lina could die all over again, she might as well have in this exact moment. She understood how foolish she was to take the bullet. But she didn't know what she was thinking, except one thing—protect Kaden. Shelter him like he has done for you. Take his pain so that he never suffers.
"I will stay by your side," Lina whispered. "For as long as my mortal years allow me, I will be with you.. You have my word, Kaden."