Experimental Log of the Crazy Lich

839 Side Story 2 – Bastard Boy/Girl Twins

The doorbell at a perfectly ordinary apartment labeled 402 kept ringing. The twins who were at home kept pretending to hear nothing.

“Ding dong!”

“Ding dong!”

Finally, the older brother, who was on the sofa and reading a book, took action because he became annoyed with the doorbell ringing.

“Karwency, go open the door.”

“...If you call me that name again, you’d better believe that I’ll bite you to death.”

“Okay then, Jiang Shiyun, go open the door.”

“...I’m going to kill you!”

The angered younger twin sister threw down her game controller and bared her teeth as she pounced over... but she was instantly suppressed by her older twin brother.

There wasn’t actually much difference in strength between the two 13-year-old half-blood siblings. However, I held the key to victory because I was wearing shorts that were easy to move in and had simple short hair, while Karwency/Jiang Shiyun was wearing a dress and painfully had her twintails pulled on.

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“Idiot, don’t bother me when I’m reading. You don’t like the name Karwency that Mom gave you, nor do you like the name Jiang Shiyun that Dad gave you, so just what do you want to be named? Say it! How am I supposed to know if you don’t say anything? My little sister, just tell me what you want to be called, okay?”

“...I think that she won’t be able to say anything until you withdraw your foot from her mouth.”

I felt rather awkward after hearing the young female voice coming from behind me. It really was rather unbecoming for my girlfriend to see me pulling on my younger sister’s twintails while sticking my foot in her mouth.

“...Harloys? How come you came in?”

“I saw that nobody opened the door for so long, so I knew that you two were fighting again, so I came in with the spare key. Roland, stop teasing Karwenz. Be careful, or she’ll make both of you die together again.”

“Hmph, a silly otaku like her? Her combat strength is less than half of a chicken!”

However, I still obediently listened to my girlfriend’s words, and let go of the still struggling Karwency.

“Aah! My female angel knight died again! Those stupid orcs! They only know how to ambush! I’m going to kill them!”

Right after she was released, Karwency didn’t actually try to attack me, but rather rushed towards her game console while tears filled her eyes.

She was playing an online game, and online games all had this common trait where leaving the game for just a moment would easily cause your character to die.

Indeed, that’s right, the original Karwenz who loved adventure and stimulation so much became addicted to games at an incredible speed after she became an Earthling for the first time. She became a complete otaku girl.

“...Hmph, with her luck stat of E? She thinks she can kill me together with her?”

Although we were reincarnated with a mission after our punishment was ended prematurely, the world still didn’t like the former Abyss Prince. Karwency now also had the special lancer ability of a luck stat of E.

The moment that she left home, her luck stat would continue to lower even more. Having a vase fall on her from above was nothing. It was even possible for her to have a meteor come crashing down on her.

After Karwency became even more of an otaku, this also became an excuse for her not to want to go outside.

“...I’m not talking about the normal meaning of killing you together with her. Aren’t you afraid that she’ll act like last time, luring you into her room in the middle of the night, and then screaming that you’re a rapist brother who wants to have his way with his twin sister?”

I was instantly rendered speechless. When Karwency did that previously, it really became a huge incident. I had been caught “right in the act”, and was almost sent off to juvenile detention by my furious parents.

As for what happened after that? That was even more embarrassing.

“Roland tried to rape Karwency...? Haha, let me laugh for a moment. You two (Roland’s parents), you’ve definitely been fooled. Without even mentioning the terrible relationship between the twins, Roland probably hasn’t even reached puberty yet. A half-wood spirit should still be hairless down there at 13 years old...”

Wood Spirit Mother Goddess Amelia vouched for me, and this was proved by having me take my pants off. Although this cleared my name, this also became a great humiliation in my life as my bastard twin sister had shouted “hairless” at me endlessly for the past three months, which was truly a pitiful experience.

When I thought about this, grudges new and old all welled up within me as I made up my mind, and lightly touched the wall socket.

*Zap!*

“There’s an electricity outage? Oh no! The boss only has 5% hp left! If I get disconnected now, my entire party will be annihilated! My dragon kill points! My dragonslayer sword!”

Her screams sounded so pleasing to me right now.

I smiled really, really proudly. Karwency then discovered that her console had been unplugged, and then naturally started fighting with me again.

“...I didn’t mean this when I mentioned killing you together with herself. Actually, you can search F website for the novel named ‘My Older Brother Can’t Possibly Be This Much of a Beast.’”

I instantly jumped up after hearing Harloys’ words. Just the novel’s name alone made me realize that something was super wrong.

I kicked Karwency aside and turned on the computer while going on F website, which was currently the most popular anime, manga, novel, and otaku interest website in the world. I then almost spat up blood when I found the novel.

“Otaku dance heavenly queen Wency is publicizing her family secret, u003cMy Beloved Older Brother Is a Beastu003e.

“Although my older twin brother is a beast, I still really love her (3000 words have been skipped for convenience)...

“That’s right, her, because she likes to wear female clothing and likes it when I call her ‘Sister’. At home whenever our parents aren’t around, I always call her ‘Sister Peach’ (another 5000 words of random fictional rubbish have been skipped here)...

“On that night, she wore female clothing while breaking into my room with a whip in her hand. Nobody else was at home (20,000 explicit words have been skipped here. Karwency probably copied some sex story with super heavy tastes)...

“...He had a huge fight with our parents. He said that I was too cute, and that not even breaking his bones would stop him... On that night, ‘she’ charged into my room again, but my parents pretended not to see anything, because they had given up...

“...I became pregnant, but she refused to be with me anymore, as her heart now belonged to another, since she had gotten really close to a bald, middle-aged, obese male teacher. I can sense that she wants to kill me so that everything can end... If I’m unable to get online for three days in a row, the text message I’ve set up will publicize my twin brother’s name, address, and picture...”

I silently closed the website as I glanced towards the corner where a certain girl was retreating while trying to secretly slip back to her room.

“Karwenz! I’m going to kill you!”

This time, I didn’t hold back during our fight. I rode on my twin sister’s back and furiously tugged on her twintails.

“Stop pulling, I’ll go bald, I’m going bald, I’m really going bald!”

Harloys helplessly sighed as she watched her boyfriend fighting with his younger twin sister yet again. Although Harloys had reincarnated to become his next-door neighbor, and seemingly became the final victor in the battle for Roland’s heart, a half-blood wood spirit’s bloodline would mature far slower than a human would. Not only that, whenever they went out on a date, many others would always be spying on them. Just when would all the drama over Roland’s heart truly end?

“Ding-dong! Ding-dong!”

The doorbell rang again, but of course, the twins were too busy with their fight to care. In the end, Harloys helplessly went over to open the door, but then she was astonished by what she saw.

“What’s the matter?”

I found it rather strange how there was no sound coming from the door, so I also went over to the front door, and then I was stunned by what I saw.

Outside the front door, an innocent black-clad priest was looking at the strange kids in this apartment. He kept wondering why they had all frozen solid upon seeing him. However, he was a consummate professional at spreading the teachings of his church, so he immediately put on a friendly smile.

“Children, do you know how love has no boundaries, and about the Divine Church of Beifeng?”