Chapter 121: If the heart doesn't feel anything
Chapter 121: If the heart doesn't feel anything
Kang Si An strokes Little Hae's hair. Little Hae has fallen asleep in his lap after playing for hours. Kyuri is not back yet. He wonders what they are doing right now. He is envious of Young Hwa who can still stay beside her when he can't. He lays down Little Hae on the bed and covers her. At least, he has Little Hae. He has a reason to look forward to the next day.
He hates it that he can't ever look back and think that Little Hae has been conceived out of love instead of his sin against Kyuri, the woman he loves. If it's that difficult for him who is the perpetrator, how difficult it is for the woman who has been the victim?
Even today, he lost his temper when it was him who was at fault. It would have been him by her side if he had been sane that night.
Why did his heart feel betrayed when it's him who betrayed her trust when he heard that she's going to register her marriage?
"I promise to be a better man from now on." He holds Little Hae's small hand. "For you and your mother, I will strive to become a better father. If I can't become the reason of happiness for your mother, I will not become the reason for her pain ever again."
***
"Son, everything went right?" Kyuri's mother asks them when they return. Their moods are slightly off. Kyuri is disturbed because she can see that Young Hwa is bothered by his encounter with that woman. Young Hwa has a lot in his mind. He doesn't want to be affected, but he can't help it.
"We got the certificates." There is a slight regret in her voice. With each step, she has been tossing the past behind and moving on. However, it seems that Young Hwa is the one who could be dragged back. She should have probably a lot thought before registering the marriage. The things aren't crazy yet. Maybe she should delay the wedding and let Young Hwa sort out whatever messing up his heart.
"Why the long face?" Kyuri's mother asks. "You youngsters! Are you showing these longs faces because I called you back? You still didn't have a wedding. The wait makes it sweeter. Believe me."
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Kyuri shows her a wry smile. "Mother, I am also a mother. I am not that inexperienced."
Her words attract his attention. Young Hwa looks at her and leans closer to whisper in her ear, "Who was being shy in the car earlier, Miss Experienced?"
Kyuri's face becomes flaming red again. She glares at him, but she keeps her mouth shut. Kyuri's mother coughs and looks away. "Have some shame. I am still here."
"Where's Father?" Kyuri asks, diverting the topic.
"He went out to play cards with his old friends." Her mother sigh. "Little Hae is playing with Kang Si An in her room."
"He hasn't left yet." She looks at the clock. "Young Hwa, stay for dinner."
"Thank you." Young Hwa didn't intend to stay, but Kang Si An hasn't left. Kyuri goes to Little Hae's room. Young Hwa follows right behind. They find Kang Si An sleeping beside Little Hae.
"We should wake him up." Young Hwa feels like someone is poking holes in his chest when he sees father and daughter asleep without care. He can't go back and change this.
"Leave him be." Kyuri closes the door. "I feel too tired to talk to him. We can't stop him from seeing Little Hae. If he wants to be the father, let him be the father."
"What about me then?" Young Hwa grumbles, giving her a pointy look.
"You are also her father." Kyuri crosses her arms and eyes him. She guesses that it's difficult not to be shaken by a past love. She has created a big scene at the airport. Compared to her, Young Hwa has been acting a lot better. "You are also my husband. So, you always have an advantage."
"Can I take advantage of it now?" He presses her against the wall and smirks at her. "I don't think that I can wait until the wedding."
Kyuri turns her head to the right and says, "I think that we are rushing, Young Hwa. How about we have our wedding a little later?"
Astonished by her suggestion, he wonders what could be the reason. He can't think of anything. Everything has been fine earlier. Then, why did she change her mind now? Is it because of Kang Si An? It's better to ask than make guesses. "Why do you want to delay it?"
She gazes at him. "Young Hwa, that woman was Yeon Seo, right?"
He released her when he hears that name. This woman is highly intuitional. Nothing can be hidden from her. "What does that got to do with us?"
"Everything." She straightens her back and decides to have a clear discussion. They seem to have forgotten that they are still standing outside Little Hae's room. "If you are still affected after seeing her, maybe you need some time to sort out the feelings. Having a wedding is bigger than getting married on papers. Your parents haven't announced it yet. I wanted to take a chance on us because of Little Hae. It doesn't mean that I would force you to with me and her. I don't want to start a marriage with the baggage of the past."
Young Hwa shuts his eyes. He tries to quieten his mind. There are a lot of thoughts. He has a lot to say. Yes, seeing her made his brain go fuzzy a bit. But, he knows what he wants.
"Kyuri." He opens his dark eyes. "You were also affected when you saw Kang Si An. You are still affected whenever he comes in front of you."
"I stopped loving Kang Si An a long time ago. He and I are different. We have a unique history, but it doesn't matter anymore if the heart doesn't feel anything."
Instead of showing anger, her face is eerily calm. Kang Si An uprooted all the love from her heart by himself. She is slowly trying to come to the terms that he wants to be Little Hae's father. Seeing him is difficult, but it's not because she loved him once. It's because she's reminded how loving him for more than a thousand years only resulted in that night.
That's not the same with Yeon Seo and Young Hwa. Both of them might love each other still.
"When I said that I would take a chance with you, I meant it. But, you aren't the same. If the appearance of that woman can rage storm inside and bring back the love, are you sure that you want to be with me?"