How to Raise Your Skeletons

Chapter 1: My Life is Doomed

“The goblins are advancing!”

“What are you all doing? Stop them immediately! Tanks to the front! Maintain formation!”

“Y-Yes, party leader! Understood!”

“Hey! Not there! Do you want to die to me before you become monster chow?”

“N-No! I’m sorry!”

Rough shouts and monstrous roars echoed in my ears.

In front, hunters in shabby outfits were fumbling around.

A typical sight in a shabby dungeon with low-level hunters.

“Haah,” a faint sigh escaped my lips as I watched them.

This is so boring, I’m going insane with boredom, I repeated to myself several times.

What on earth was I doing here?

“Excuse me, Mr. Necromancer?” someone called out to me.

“Ah, yes?”

Turning my head, I saw the party leader, who had been shouting orders since earlier.

“We need you to lend us some of your power, as agreed. Could you do that?”

“Of course. That’s what I was hired for as a mercenary.”

It wasn’t difficult.

To those fumbling rookies up front, this dungeon might be terrifying. But this was just an E-rank dungeon at best.

To the ever-so-amazing necromancer, the so-called noble of nobles, these goblins were nothing more than fireflies before a full moon or a flock of sheep before a lion.

Though I can’t exactly claim to be a true necromancer…

But that’s a story for another time.

I raised the staff I had been fiddling with.

I gotta work for the money I’ve been paid.

A sharp sensation accompanied by the draining of my energy followed.

[Skill: ‘Summon Ordinary Skeleton’ (E-rank) activated.]

[10 energy consumed.]

[‘Bonehead 1’ summoned.]

[Skill: ‘Summon Ordinary Skeleton’ (E-rank) activated.]

[10 energy consumed.]

[‘Bonehead 2’ summoned.]

[Skill: ‘Summon Ordinary Skeleton’ (E-rank) activated.]

[10 energy consumed.]

[‘Bonehead 3’ summoned.]

—Creak, clatter!

Horrible joint noises echoed as the black mist lifted, and three fearsome skeletons wielding weapons appeared in the dungeon.

Both the charging goblins and the trembling hunters froze at the sight.

Then their eyes widened in astonishment.

“Oh, oh?!”

“Wow, a necromancer!”

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“Isn’t that the highly esteemed power of necromancy, which is considered one of the greatest authorities nowadays? Once awakened, it’s a given they’ll become a ranker, and top guilds will line up like ants to recruit them!”

“Wow, no wonder the party leader was so composed… There was a reason for it. When did you recruit such a valuable member?”

The hunters, tense just moments ago, now cheered excitedly.

This is the prestige that the unique authority of a ‘necromancer’ holds. It’s a profession akin to being born with a silver spoon in one’s mouth, allowing one to live elegantly in this wretched era. Among 7.9 billion people, it was a rare profession with fewer than 1,000 such individuals.

However, I shook my head, I’m just a malformed necromancer.

“Grrr, krrrr!”

In front of me, ten green-skinned monsters flinched.

Their primary weapon was a dagger. Their small stature was reminiscent of dwarves.

Alright, let’s deal with them first.

“Kill them, my lovely skeletons.”

—Clatter!

At my simple command, the three robust skeletons charged forward.

They were undead. Being unkillable, they had no fear of death. Hence, they swung their weapons without hesitation as they ran.

[Green Goblin defeated.]

[Green Goblin defeated.]

[Green Goblin defeated.]

…

—Slash! Slash!

The goblins were quickly slaughtered by the merciless skeletons.

—Splat!

Red blood and green skin formed a grim tableau on the ground.

“Wow, I’m jealous,” the hunters marveled.

“Isn’t that the basic skeleton summoning skill, the foundation of necromancy? But why does he only summon skeletons?”

“Well, why do you think? An E-rank dungeon is something he can handle with just skeletons.”

“I guess so, right? Wow… But seriously, I’m so envious… So envious I could die. He can just summon undead, and they handle all the fighting for him.”

By the way, the reason for their envy is simple. Unique authorities are not determined by effort but by innate luck.

About ten years ago, every human received a unique authority upon turning twenty and becoming an adult. The content of these authorities is random. Some received authorities related to blacksmithing or tailoring. Others received auxiliary authorities like exploration, healing, or buffing. Additionally, some received authorities so worthless they were pitiful.

What was the worst authority I had ever seen?

Shit Eater, was it?

It was an authority that seemed to grow stronger the more dung you ate. Just thinking about it gave me the chills, so I’ll leave it at that.

Anyway.

Since one’s authority is determined by luck, it’s natural to feel a sense of relative deprivation.

I don’t know who the goddamn entity responsible for this is, however…

Thanks to that transcendent being, humanity survived the invasion of monstrous creatures and continued to survive.

Or maybe those monsters were just more playthings to the transcendent being.

“Krrr!”

Eventually, the ten goblins were reduced to mere piles of flesh.

“Wow.”

“That’s freaking amazing… They took care of it in under two minutes.”

“Man, if only I had a long-range authority like a mage or summoner, I wouldn’t be suffering through this hell.”

“Right? Do they even know what it’s like to face monsters up close, to feel their breath right on you?”

I let out a bitter chuckle.

Don’t be too envious.

To them, it might sound like I have it easy. But if they knew my circumstances, they’d look at me with pity. Why do I say that?

Status window.

—Whoosh!

As I mentally called out for the status window, a holographic display appeared before me, visible only to my eyes, showing my personal information.

[Hunter: Joo Donghoon]

[Alias: X]

[Energy: 70/100]

[Unique authority: Cursed Necromancer]

[Rank: E]

[Effect]

– You possess the profession of a necromancer, capable of handling dead souls. You can use fearsome spirits and toxic substances to subdue opponents. However, you are cursed.

– You can only summon skeletons.

[Skills]

– Summon Ordinary Skeleton (E-rank)

What the actual fudge.

No matter how many times I looked, it was infuriating.

A necromancer, by definition, should be able to summon reliable creatures like liches, Dullahans, death knights, and the like.

However…

– You can only summon skeletons.

The only thing I could summon was skeletons.

In an E-rank dungeon, they might be powerful. But beyond that, they wouldn’t even be treated as dog bones scattered on the ground in a D-rank dungeon or higher.

“…”

In some ways, my life was worse than these rookies’ in front of me. They at least had growth potential.

Three years had passed since I received my authority, yet I hadn’t managed to get past E-rank dungeons. My peers, who received their authority around the same time as me, were advancing to D-rank and C-rank dungeons.

“…”

So to summarize this shitty situation in one phrase?

It seems like my life is doomed.

* * *

Reaper Scans

Translator – Dawn

Proofreader – BringTheRayn

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* * *

“Team Leader, I’ve finished today’s work. I’ll be heading home now.”

I said my farewell to Kim Junseo, the leader of the dungeon request team in our small mercenary guild, and stepped outside.

—Whoosh!

A cold breeze brushed against my face.

“Haah…” A sigh escaped my lips, bitter like cigarette smoke.

After deducting fees and taxes, the pay for today’s work will be deposited at the end of the month.

With my limited authority, the only jobs I can take are E-rank dungeon requests.

I need to eat and survive, after all.

“Damn you… world.”

The more I thought about it, the harder it hit me. What had I done wrong to deserve this curse from that transcendent being?

“Buddha, Jesus, God… Or whoever you are, unknown deity. If you would give me power, why couldn’t it be so useless that I wouldn’t even have any expectations? What even is this?”

Damn you for giving me false hope like this.

“If I could work in production, I wouldn’t even complain.”

Special authorities related to everyday life are better than mediocre combat authorities. At least those can help support hunters and earn some money.

By the way, today’s earnings from the dungeon, after deductions, were a mere 40,000 won*.

*Around $30 USD

Despite this, I couldn’t give up being a hunter.

Because this is the only thing I want to do.

A hunter—those who prove their strength within a dungeon.

No matter how tough it got or how much reality hit me, I didn’t want to give up this job. After all, you only live once, and you should live doing what you love!

“Here’s some good news today!”

“What news is it?”

“Dark Lord, who successfully cleared the Lunar Rift last time, has become a ranker in just three years! This makes him the 37th official ranker in Korea, second only to the United States worldwide. Amazing, right?”

As I walked home, the billboard on a building displayed a hunter-related channel.

“Wow, a ranker. Those are the hunters ranked within the top 1,000 in the world, right? The ones automatically updated monthly.”

“Yes, that’s correct. Dark Lord ranked 950th this month. But! This achievement for Dark Lord holds a different meaning.”

“Oh, and what would that be?”

“He’s the only hunter to become a ranker in just three years! Excluding the first-generation hunters, of course!”

“Wow! The shortest time taken to become a ranker?”

“Yes, it shows how incredible an authority necromancy really is!”

“Wow! I can’t express how fortunate it is for our country to have a necromancer!”

Yes. That right there. That’s what amplifies my frustration and makes reality hit harder.

Dark Lord.

He’s a necromancer, just like me! Moreover, we received our authorities on the same day!

And one of us is already a ranker. The other is still hard-stuck at E-rank.

He already has a cool alias, ‘Dark Lord.’ Meanwhile, my status window only shows my name, Joo Donghoon.

Just because I’m cursed.

Someone might ask, What do you know? Don’t speak ill without knowing how much effort that hunter, Dark Lord, put in. Instead of complaining, find something constructive to do.

That’s a good point.

To be honest, my heart is filled with envy and jealousy. It’s resentment toward the transcendentj being who added an element of ‘luck’ to authorities.

But that doesn’t mean I never put in any effort. On the contrary, I can proudly say I’m working harder than anyone else.

To become a ‘ranker.’

If people knew what I was doing to achieve that, they’d be shocked.

“…”

I left the noisy billboard behind and moved toward the deserted forest path at the top of a shantytown.

[Hunter: Joo Donghoon]

[Energy: 100/100]

“Alright.”

The energy I used during the day had already been fully restored.

Now… It’s time to show what efforts I’ve been making and what I’ve achieved so far.