I, Your Father, Carry a Big Stick

Chapter 57: A Cold Breeze in Spring

“You know, I kind of figured you’d be the last one up. You like showing off, don’t you~?”

Instead of falling for Wu’s ‘provocation,’ Sasuke appeared calm and stoic as he stated, “I won’t remain in your shadow forever, Wu. Once I surpass you, I’m sure defeating ‘that man’ will follow soon after.”

Spreading his arms in a ‘come hither’ gesture, Wu’s already cheeky smile became more so as he teased, “I cast a pretty big shadow…”

Interpreting Wu’s words as a trigger, Sasuke lowered his center of gravity and performed a rapid sequence of hand signs for his Clan’s famous Fire Release: Fire Ball Jutsu. The original Jutsu allowed the user to temporarily augment their lung capacity using Yang Chakra, subsequently using it as a fuel source to create a rather sizeable inferno once exhaled. The version Sasuke used functioned off of the same principles, but instead of allowing the flames to spread and engulf a target, he condensed them into a much smaller area, drastically enhancing the speed and penetrative capabilities of the Jutsu.

Though he was able to dodge the laser-like cone of condensed flame, Wu could feel the skin on his body drying out due to the intense heat. Instead of being bothered by this, however, an excited smile developed across his face as he accelerated toward the ‘defenseless’ Uchiha.

While most people struggled to deactivate or modify active Jutsu due to the intense focus required to shape and control the technique, Sasuke’s eyes followed Wu like a hawk that had locked onto its prey, a trio of pitch-black tomoe revolving within his abruptly scarlet irises. At the same time, he swept the beam of flame in Wu’s direction, widening an imaginary focal point to convert the attack from a high-velocity laser to an encompassing flamethrower.

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Grinning fiercely, Wu extended his left hand and diffused his Chakra to form an invisible, inverted cone. The moment Sasuke’s flames entered into it, they became condensed to a point before rebounding, much like a shaped charge. Luckily for Sasuke, Wu didn’t angle the inverted flames at him as the escape velocity of the ‘charge’ nearly exceeded the speed of a lightning strike.

Though Wu directed the concentrated blast a few meters away from him, Sasuke was impacted by the resultant explosion. Tiny pieces of shrapnel pierced his clothing and even tore into his flesh, but the expression on his face remained serious and resolute as he formed hand seals in the middle of being blasted away.

Before crashing into the ground directly, Sasuke flipped over at the last moment, his feet sliding through the dirt before he planted both hands on the ground and used the Earth Release: Earth-Style Wall. The moment he completed the technique, a five-meter tall, one-meter thick wall of earth formed a semi-crescent barrier in front of him, obscuring him from view.

As Wu wondered what the boy was up to, he sensed a ‘thread’ of Chakra move through the ground and rapidly condense beneath his feet. Once it had reached an appropriate level, it erupted from the ground in the form of multiple spikes, attempting to skewer him but failing as he shrunk to his smallest size and slid down one with his hands behind his head…

Feeling no ‘feedback’ from his Jutsu, Sasuke took immediate evasive action, flipping backward several times so that his view was no longer obstructed by his earth wall. When he saw no traces of Wu anywhere, he strained his eyes to their absolute limit, knowing the boy could ‘pop’ up just about anywhere.

“Man, this hair could house a crow….”

Interrupting Sasuke’s focus, Wu expanded to the size of a small doll atop the boy’s head, appending, “How many bottles of conditioner do you go through in a week?”

Clicking his tongue, Sasuke said, “Get off my head.” instead of trying to remove Wu forcefully. Fortunately, Wu did precisely that, hopping off the raven-haired youth’s head to say, “You’re improving rapidly, but it was a mistake to obscure your own vision, especially when your opponent is an incredibly talented, potentially even peerless Sensor such as myself. I’m only giving you a six this time around. You can do better.”

Instead of getting angry or upset, Sasuke gave a curt nod in response to Wu’s words before turning around, placing his hands into his pocket, and saying, “It’s a shame you aren’t participating in the Chunin Exams. I still have a lot of tricks up my sleeve…”

Shrugging his shoulders, Wu remarked, “You’re welcome to show them to me now.” but Sasuke just continued walking away, exuding the ‘cool’ aura he had inadvertently cultivated since his Academy days.

Resisting the urge to roll his eyes, Wu shifted his attention to the peanut gallery and said, “Okay, you lot, go ahead and git. I, Your Father, have a beautiful wife patiently awaiting my return. If you aren’t staying for dinner or planning to live here in the future, bugger off.”

Hearing Wu’s braggadocious words, Kiba asked the first question that came to everyone’s minds, “Are you going to be cooking? If so, I’m down to chill and eat dinner at your place.”

As the food Wu cooked was always inexplicably delicious, everyone who had been allowed to try it eagerly looked forward to the next opportunity. His secret was the same thing that permitted him to farm the revitalizing peaches: Natural Energy. By infusing it into the food he served, he could drastically enhance the flavor while providing various benefits to anyone fortunate enough to consume it.

Making a shooing gesture with his right hand, Wu asserted, “I don’t need snot-nosed brats ogling my bride while I toil away in the kitchen. Anyone with a dick can go shove it in a hole somewhere.”

Though everyone present was fairly used to how crass Wu could be, the boys within the group couldn’t help feeling slightly annoyed. They knew Wu was trying to brag, and, after seeing his wife, they honestly couldn’t blame him. The only two people that didn’t seem to mind were Lee and Shino, but the former was perennially enthusiastic while the latter never showed his emotions in public…

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With the exception of Hinata, who followed after Naruto despite her stomach producing an audible growl, all of the girls accompanied Wu to the Main House of the Senju Clan Estate. The opportunity to sample Wu’s cuisine was too good to pass, so after checking to see if it was okay with Sasuke, Ino and Sakura tagged along with Tenten, a frequent guest, and diner within the Estate.

On their way to the Main House, Ino openly remarked, “I still can’t believe you got married to Lady Tsunade, Wu-kun. I know you like strong women, but how exactly does that work? I know she looks young, but isn’t she like thirty-seven years older than you? And what about Tenten?”

Answering in Wu’s stead, Tenten had a half-lidded expression as she pointedly replied, “Wu-kun and I are doing just fine, thank you. Both my parents and Lady Tsunade have given us their permission, so we’re still dating with the intent to marry once I become a Jonin. You should worry more about yourself, Yamanaka-san…”

Furrowing her brows, Ino said, “I told you to stop calling me that. I know you don’t like me, but can’t we at least try to get along around Wu-kun…?”

Narrowing her eyes further, Tenten retorted, “I don’t see why that should matter to you. You’re not Wu-kun’s girlfriend or anything, so why should I try to get along with someone I dislike?”

With her left eye twitching visibly, Ino suppressed her urge to shout as she said, “You’re way too serious…if I had known you were going to be so butthurt about it, I would have just lied to you. I honestly don’t even get why you’re so angry. If Wu-kun was against it, he could have stopped it or said no whenever he wanted. What am I going to do, overpower and force him…?”

Attempting to prevent ‘yet another’ fight between Ino and Tenten, Sakura made a placating gesture with her hands, her expression awkward as she said, “Calm down, you two. I get why you’re angry, Tenten, but it’s not like Ino had any malicious intentions…”

Directing her half-lidded gaze to Sakura, Tenten’s tone was flat and piercing as she said, “Considering you were partly responsible for what transpired, you should just keep your mouth shut, Sakura…”

With the expression on her face becoming even more awkward, Sakura looked to Wu as if to prompt him to speak out in her defense. Fortunately for her, he did have something to say on the matter, stating, “If you need someone to direct your anger towards, feel free to target it at me. As Ino said, I could have put a stop to things whenever I wanted. I just went with the flow because it was interesting and exciting. I’m not going to tell the three of you to get along, but squabbling like this serves no purpose. Besides…”

Pulling Tenten toward him before she could begin to pout, Wu sealed her lips with a rather assertive kiss, hefting her by her butt while Sakura and Ino could only watch. The two had started dating Sasuke around seven months before graduation, but the most intimate acts they had performed with the ‘resolute’ youth was holding hands, linking arms, and going on a handful of dates. They ‘had’ kissed a few times, but it was nothing like the interaction between Wu and Tenten.

Though she offered a middling resistance in the beginning, largely due to the presence of Ino and Sakura, Tenten eventually gave up and permitted herself to melt in Wu’s embrace. She intended to chastise him for fondling her butt in ‘public,’ but that was a matter for future her to worry about…

After nearly two full minutes of kissing, Wu permitted Tenten to catch her breath, his expression smoldering and voice deep as he asserted, “You’re the only girl present qualified to receive my affection. Also, as cute as you are when pouty, you’re outright beautiful when you exude the confidence I love you for…smile for me, dango girl…”

Turning her eyes up due to Wu calling her ‘dango girl,’ Tenten’s anger was nowhere to be seen as she said, “You’re such a dork, Wu-kun…”

Without missing a beat, Wu retorted, “Perhaps…but you know you love it, just as I love everything about you. Especially this…”

Since he still had his hands on Tenten’s ass, Wu gave it a firm squeeze. As fond as he was becoming of large breasts, the elasticity of a woman’s ass was a direct reflection of the effort they made to improve or maintain their appearance. Tenten worked harder than most girls, so Wu felt as though he could appreciate her ass all day without feeling like he was wasting his time.

As the blush in her cheeks bled to her ears, Tenten adopted an insincere ‘warning’ look as she whispered, “Behave yourself…”

Releasing his hold on the petite brunette’s ass, Wu raised his hands as if to yield as he playfully mused, “If that’s truly what you desire, your wish is my command…”

Rolling her eyes, Tenten resisted the urge to retort, instead shifting her attention to Sakura and Ino. Both had rather prominent blushes on their faces, but Sakura had the good sense to avert her eyes while Ino had a pouty, slightly teary-eyed expression on her face. The latter had been trying to ‘pressure’ Sasuke in a similar way as she had Wu, but the former was significantly less ‘easy going’ than the latter. Thus, even though she was dating the boy she had always had a crush on, Ino felt more than a little frustrated after nearly a year of ‘restraint.’

Feeling a little amused by Ino’s reaction, a taunting smile made its way to Tenten’s face. She wasn’t ‘trying’ to taunt the boyish blonde; it just kind of happened, prompting Ino to internally scream (“This cheeky bitch…!”) as her hands formed into indignant fists…

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(A/N: Teenage drama at its finest. And yes, Ino does have a somewhat boyish look. She developed the habit of wearing more casual clothes due to her training and kept her hair relatively short, similar to her younger self or Shippuden Sakura. Think Android 18, just in the style of Naruto.)