Ihoujin, Dungeon ni Moguru

Chapter 4.2: The Foreigner, Can’t Explore the Dungeon III

「You dug the grave too deep, you fool. It took me half a day to crawl out」

「No, weren’t you dead?」

I had taken its pulse. Its blood had solidified and its pupils weren’t moving.

「Fufu, a death of that level goes away in a few hours」

This world’s cats were incredible.

「Souya. You’re looking for a god to be contracted to, right?」

「That’s right, Misuranika-sama. Could it be that you are going to introduce me to one?」

「You dunce, I’m telling you to form a contract with me」

「Huh?」

Eh, this is a god? You’re lying. There’s no god that shows its belly and twitches its legs while sleeping after eating its fill.

「Foreigner, did you just say Misuranika?」

「Eh, yes. Could it be that it’s famous」

After answering the Guild President’s question, I asked him back.

「There were once three kingdoms on this right continent. They were countries with powerful technologies and civilizations that can no longer be reproduced today. They were at the height of their prosperity, but there was a woman who destroyed them all by herself. Her name was Misuranika. A woman who obtained the position of a god through misdeeds and intrigue」

「Smug」

Misuranika-sama puffed out her chest proudly.

「I heard that your followers had died out and you had already ceased to exist though」

「If I was virtuous enough to disappear gracefully, I wouldn’t have become a god. After all, I had survived by catching and eating rats in jail」

So, that meant that Misuranika-sama was formerly a human.

Depending on her appearance, my faith would be different.

「So, Souya. Do you want to be contracted? You want to, don’t you? Don’t~ you?」

「I do!」

「Ehー, I wonder what I should do~ You’ve been so rude to me. Well, it’ll depend on how you ask for it」

I showed off a move that was very admirable, if I say so myself.

I went down on both knees and straightened my back as I sat down. This is known as the Seiza position. Both of my hands were still on top of my thighs. I lowered my head in a smooth motion. It’s crucial not to build too much momentum. Bad momentum would give the other party a sense of intimidation. Then, I placed both hands on the ground, making a diamond shape between them, and stopped my bow with my forehead floating about the thickness of a finger above the floor. Touching and scraping the ground wasn’t hygienic. It’s important to be refined.

「Please! Misuranika-sama! Please! I beg you! I beg youuu~!」

This is the greatest ultimate technique of the Japanese nation, the Dogeza.

I put into it the feelings of farmers who were faced with tax collectors during a famine. I felt an illusion of rice floating behind me.

「Eh……… Um………… Okay. Stop it already, it’s embarrassing」

「I’ll give you a warning, foreigner. Serving a god of misdeeds will cause you more anguish than not having a god」

「There’s a saying in my country. If there are gods that can be abandoned, there are gods that can be picked up. So shut your mouth, brat」

It’s an evil god though.

「In that pose, everything you say sounds pathetic」

Misuranika-sama’s retort was absolutely right.

Speaking of which, Evetta-san was curled into a ball in the corner of the room. I’ll leave her be.

「Let’s begin, do the knight’s ceremony according to the ancient country’s traditions」

「I’m sorry, I have no idea what that is」

Misuranika-sama sighed.

「Go down on your left knee and put your left hand on your right shoulder. Open the fingers of your right hand and place it on the ground, making sure I can see it」

I did as I was told.

「Lower your head. Don’t look at me until I say it’s okay. Under no circumstances」

The atmosphere changed.

The presence that I felt was not that of a cat. Instead, it felt like there was a person standing there. I heard the patter of bare feet. Bare toes came into view.

「Misuranika, of the dark fire, asks: Will you become my sword and satisfy my cravings? That sword will earn no honor, that blood will enjoy no prosperity, that soul will know no peace. For all that, if you still have no objections, answer me with silence」

「………」

I answered.

「Misuranika, of the evil schemes, asks: Will you turn hardship and humiliation into your own strength, accomplishing what you can accomplish, gaining what you can gain, seizing what you can seize? And are you willing to even plot against the king and slay the hero? If you have no objections, answer me with silence.」

「………」

「Misuranika, of misdeeds, will respond to that silence. Knight without a sword. Person without faith. Foreigner without god. A strong person of the “fringe”, who fears not notoriety, wants no honor and holds no dreams. I forgive your sinful crimes, your deceptive machinations, and even if you become the dark fire that ignites disaster, only I will forgive everything. Therefore――――」

The feel of fine hair brushing my ear, the soft flesh pressed on my shoulder, something was sweetly leaning on me. A seductive woman’s smell. A demonic whisper at my ear.

「Those blood and bones, even those echos of resentment, they are mine」

I felt wet lips on my neck. Her tongue crawled on my skin and her fingers slid along my face. I felt a pain like a needle had pierced my heart. After a brief moment of breathlessness, I saw a vision of myself vomiting out my entrails and breathing my last in agony.

I swallowed back the shivering.

Fear was a man’s shame.

「With this, the contract is established. Raise your head」

「Yes」

There was a gray cat in front of me.

This was the god’s shadow. It was a fake appearance and its real contents were terrifying. But more than anything, whether the one by my side was a demon or not, it was still better than being alone.

In addition to that, there was one thing that I was curious about.

「Military policeman! How was my god?!」

「Oh, as might be expected, her looks were stunningly beautiful. She’s an awe-inspiring and tremendous beauty」

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Damn, I wanted to see it so badly.

「You, that’s enough already」

「Okay! It’s the job of the Adventurers’ Guild to deal with the rest. Get out」

I was released without incident.

After checking my equipment that had been returned to me, I went outside. There, the Guild President called out to me.

A thin, formidable smile.

「Well then, foreigner. Even if it’s the god of misdeeds, a god is still a god. The Adventurers’ Guild will wait for your registration. Let’s talk about those three after your registration is done」

「Souya, I’ll be waiting for you!」

Evetta-san was quite far away. Was this person scared of cats or just Misuranika-sama?

I could have just gone to the Guild right then, but I parted with them for the time being and returned to the camp.

Because of Misuranika-sama’s fits of petulance along the way back, I bought some fresh pork.

I returned to the still ravaged camp.

First things first, I got the kitchen back into a decent condition.

The size of the meat on the cutting board made me feel excited. I removed the sinew using a kitchen knife. After that, I lightly salted and peppered the meat then lightly sprinkled wheat over it. After kneading and pounding it, I let the meat sit for a while.

「Oh」

I had forgotten something important. I went to check the progress of Makina’s restart. The restart meter was up to 59%. I heaved a sigh of relief. With this, it should be operational by tomorrow.

And one more important thing.

「Um, Misuranika-sama. Since you’re a cat, are the things you can’t eat the same as cats after all? Will you die from food poisoning?」

「I may be a fringe god but I’m still a god, I won’t get food poisoning」

Well, even if she died, she would revive soon after. I put on the glasses-type device, which was still not functioning, and started slicing onions. I had seen onions grilled without seasoning and sold at stalls, and had witnessed them being eaten by cat-men. In other words, their digestive systems were probably no different from humans. Taking some watercress from the river, I cut them into bite-sized pieces.

「Guh, my eyes, it’s stinging my eyes. What the heck is this?」

My god was feeling pain from the onion fumes and was rolling around. I cut them up quickly and left them to one side. I mashed the garlic and put it into the soy sauce, along with a little bit of honey.

Putting the frying pan on the fire, I dropped a generous amount of butter into the pan.

After it had completely melted, I arranged the meat extravagantly in the pan. I had not eaten since last night so my stomach growled at the aroma of butter and meat. But I cooked it without rushing. The meat was thick and fresh so I couldn’t afford to be lazy and careless.

I had to keep moving the pan on and off the fire as I struggled with the vague heat from the burning firewood.

I turned the meat over and repeated the process. I was feeling nervous because this food was meant for treating other people, no…, for treating a god. Sweat pouring from my forehead, I continued moving the pan. Inserting the kitchen knife into the meat, I checked its temperature. The heat had been absorbed flawlessly and it was properly cooked and juicy. After cutting the meat into bite-sized pieces, I dribbled the garlic soy sauce over them uniformly, and roasted them over the fire.

The rich aroma of butter was mixed with appetite-inducing smell of the garlic soy sauce. There was also the sound of the dripping juices.

It was pure torture on an empty stomach.

「Souya, I’m at my limit. Faster」

「Misuranika-sama, is it alright for me to base your salt intake level on human standards?」

「It’s probably the same. Fasterー, fasterー」

My god was hurrying me while hanging onto my back.

I ate a small piece to check the taste. Delicious. Yeah, this pork would probably taste good no matter how it was cooked. I wondered where they were they raised.

I heaped the roasted meat onto a plate. Misuranika-sama sniffed at it, her nose twitching, and then bit into it.

「Hot!」

She jumped then took a tumble. She was a god that fell over a lot. I stir-fried the onions and watercress with the meat juices left in the pan and added a small pinch of salt.

Completed. It was a bit simple, but it’s alternate world pork with butter soy sauce and a side of stir-fried vegetables for brunch.

「Okay~, Misuranika-sama. Say a~hh」

After blowing on it to cool it, I proffered my god a piece of meat on a fork.

「Oh, it’s hot! Hot! Munch, munch」

She was chewing with difficulty as she couldn’t handle hot food just like other cats.

「It tastes okay」

「Understood」

She licked around her mouth.

「What about you?」

「I’m fine with eating later」

I fully intended to bear such courtesy to mind. As long as I owed a debt of gratitude, it’s human decency to respond to that. If I couldn’t even do something like that, I would be lower than a beast. Even if I was a warped fool, I wanted to be human.

「Hm~mmm」

「?」

Misuranika-sama had a mysterious expression on her face.

「Do you have other plates?」

「Yes, I do. In that container over there. Should I bring some?」

「It’s fine. More importantly, close your eyes」

「Yes」

I closed my eyes and covered my face with my hands.

「Don’t lookー You definitely can’t look, okayー」

「Yes, yes」

I heard the clatter of plates and sounds of eating.

「It’s alright now」

The voice telling me open my eyes sounded a bit far away. It came from inside the slanted tent.

「You absolutely can’t peep! I’ll curse you if you look!」

「Understood」

Only the amount of meat was drastically reduced. She must have moved the meat to another plate. Well, it was probably hard to eat in the form of a cat.

「Itadakimasu」

After that, I ate my meal in silence.

However, I couldn’t help but be curious. I couldn’t concentrate on the taste of the food at all. I wanted to take a peek at the true form of my god. My imagination was running wild because of what I had heard from the military policeman. But like the story of The Grateful Crane, it was possible that she would cancel the contract if I saw her true form, and currying her favor was also the job of a god’s follower.

「Oh」

The plate was empty before I realized. Darn…… I couldn’t concentrate on the taste at all.

「Misuranika-sama, please take your time with the meal. I’ll be working in the vicinity of the containers, so if there is anything, please give me a shout」

「Do as you see fit」

I picked up the manual that had been dropped on the ground, searched through the entries and found what I needed.

A method to search for the containers without Makina’s support. Simple probes had been installed on all the containers. They were shaped like big flashlights. Or rather, they were exactly like flashlights as actual lights were attached to them. A radio, though it was useless in this world, could be used to locate the probes. Using the USB, I connected it to another search device, which came with a delightful hand-crank charger.

I selected the number for the containers I wanted to search for. Medical and armament containers were 3 and 4 respectively.

There was no response.

I checked its range in the manual. It was 50m. That was pretty short. Moreover, it only had a simple mechanism, a sound would get louder or softer depending on my distance to the containers. It didn’t tell the exact direction but it was a bit better than nothing.

I looked around for other things that might be useful.

That ended up as fruitless effort.

I heard the sound of water and the clatter of plates behind me. Even though I was curious, there was something I was concentrating on at the moment.

I gave the returned equipment a quick look-over, but the AK was no longer usable after all. No matter how rugged and maintenance-free it was, it’s useless when it had been physically split into two. I couldn’t rely on the Government either as I only had two magazines with seven shots each left. Although it couldn’t cut into the pig, I had the hunting knife which did cut into human bodies quite easily. Although they did regenerate immediately.

I wondered if all adventurers were like that.

What was left was the karambit, which had been given to me a long time ago but I still wasn’t used to wielding. If you wanted to stab something, an ordinary knife was better, and the hole at the end of the grip, which had traces of light usage, was also a hindrance. I had even hurt myself with that curved blade before. Well, I had been shown how to use it, but the counter-attack-like techniques to slice the opponent’s hands and neck were impossible without considerable proficiency with it, and it might be better to call it a knife used for defense. Well, in brief, it was something like a talisman. I didn’t want to get into situations where I would need to rely on it.

If I couldn’t use what I had on hand, then I would rely on knowledge instead, so I read the manual again carefully.

Simple medical manuals.

Illustrated survival guides.

Manga of what to do in emergency situations.

Manga of the history of artificial intelligence.

Specialist manual of repair procedures for the Makina units.

This manual, like all my other equipment, would be completely disintegrated in about one year because of bio-telomere technology.

Just as I was thinking that the manual wasn’t of much use, I saw there there was a page that had stuck to another because it was wet.

Only this page was of a different material. It was a handwritten page that had been added afterwards. What’s more, the words were scribbled as if in a hurry.

『Danger. Emergency measures in the event of death or incapacitation of team members and the Makina units. I’ll write again that it’s dangerous, so use it only as a last resort』

That last resort was rather useful at the moment.

※

In the first place, who hired those down-and-out adventurers? Who stole the containers?

Obviously, the adventurers had the right to stay silent if they were interrogated by the military police. Or rather, it seemed that they were in a state where they could not be interrogated because I hurt them a little too much.

If I had to guess, it was either a merchant company or the royal family.

The possibility that those adventurers were working alone couldn’t be ruled out, but a merchant company would still be needed to convert those goods into money that they could spend. That was unlikely though, as adventurers were well-connected and the Guild was on the lookout for such things. As I thought, it was much more likely that it was a merchant company that had the funds and could hire people. It was also highly possible that the royal family was behind it, in terms of having the funds and the ability to move people, but if they were the culprit then there would be nothing I could do. Therefore, I moved with the assumption that the culprit was a merchant company.

Once noon had passed, I went to the city again.

I put the sleepy Misuranika-sama on my shoulder and got a reaction in the place I had expected to, the warehouse district.

「Excuse me. Which merchant company does this warehouse belong to?」

By chance, I encountered a man who seemed to be a warehouse guard, so I asked him.

「The Zavua Night Owl company」

「Thank you」

Grinning ear to ear, I left.

I quickly found the main store of the Zavua Night Owl company, which also ran a pawnshop.

It had a good location in the middle of the main street.

When I walked inside, a lineup of numerous weapons greeted me. No matter the situation, a man’s heart would flutter with excitement when surrounded by such things.

The clerks were engaging and lively, and adventurers who were taken in by them would spend their money with gusto. It was this kind of store.

「Welcome. Is there anything that you are looking for today? I can show you around if you like」

I was called out to by an elderly woman. She was plump and elegant. If such a person recommends you equipment, you’ll probably end up buying this and that.

「Excuse me. I want to see the store owner please」

「Please excuse my rudeness, but what business do you have with him?」

I breathed in deeply and tried to be as coercive as possible as I spoke in a low voice.

「I want to purchase all the foreign goods that you have here」

「………」

I was met with silence. Her smile had suddenly disappeared. She called some people over and whispered to them.

「Dear sir, please go upstairs」

I was escorted to the second floor of the store by two strong men.

It was probably a guest room. It featured stuffed animals that I have never seen before, gilded furniture, and glittering ornamental swords. And a sofa and a table that seemed expensive. The windows were closed and it was dim inside.

A man was waiting.

It was the man who was at the pawnshop.

I thought that he was pretty young to be the representative for a business like this. Did he have the talent, the wealth, or both?

Now, what would he do?

「Leave. Let me be alone with the guest」

The guards left as commanded.

「Now, please take a seat」

「Thank you」

I did as I was told and sat on the huge sofa. Oh, it’s soft and fluffy. Misuranika-sama got off my shoulder and curled up on it.

「Foreigner, I heard an interesting story about you」

「Ahh, the thing where I practically “balled up” three adventurers?」

A small laugh.

「Well then. What’s your business with me?」

So, he was going to feign ignorance.

「I want the things that those adventurers stole to be returned to me. If you do it now, I’ll pretend to have not seen anything」

「Returned, even if you say that… Now, what could you be talking about?」

Of course it would turn out this way.

「What if I told you that they stored what they stole in your warehouse?」

「It’s a pity」

「?」

I didn’t know what his words were referring to.

「No, it’s really a pity. Foreigner, you possess wonderful technology. You have power beyond our understanding. Moreover, you have guts and skill. But, it’s a pity」

Was it a sign of his confidence that he wasn’t bothering to hide it anymore?

「You are all alone. I can move the items in the warehouse with just one word. Are you going to call the military police? Or the Adventurers’ Guild? Either way, you won’t be in time. I can claim my innocence as much as I want. It’s really a pity. You might have stood a small, slight chance against me if only you didn’t reveal the fact that you can grasp their location」

「But then, even if I was able to recover them, it’s meaningless if they just get stolen again, right?」

Like what he had said, it was impossible for me to protect my current resources by myself. If I recovered them, then had them stolen again, I would quickly get exhausted and eventually become unable to act. Even if I hired a guard, I would be fleeced out of my middling amount of money and gradually become penniless. To begin with, I would be paranoid about whether the guard would steal from me.

The man laughed very happily. It was the laughter of someone who had won with a margin to spare.

「It’s good that you’re perceptive. So, do you still possess anything that can be sold? Next time, please bring them here before you lose them. I’ll buy them at a reasonable price」

「No, I no longer have such things」

「In that case,」

He stuck his hand out to the side, indicating to me that I should leave.

I picked up Misuranika-sama, who was completely asleep, and stood up.

「Lastly, is it ok if I ask you two things?」

「Whatever you wish」

He was really composed.

「You’re confident that I won’t try anything reckless here?」

「You’ve lost your firearm, right? And even if you try something, I’ll just do this」

He snapped his fingers. A man who had been waiting outside came in. He was a big and fierce-looking man. I had no further impressions of him.

「His abilities are remarkable. He has already quashed many adventurers who had disputes with our merchant company」

Understood.

「Can you open the window?」

「Hey you, open it」

As instructed, the man of remarkable ability opened the window. The glare and the noises from outside came in from the window, which just happened to be facing the direction of the warehouse.

「The containers that you guys stole have something installed in them as an emergency measure」

I operated the search device which had a certain function that I had already linked some time ago. I pressed its red button twice, waited one second, then held it down for five seconds.

「It’s what is called a self-destruct mechanism」

A sound like distant thunder.

Smoke shot up like a geyser. Of course, the smoke had come from where the warehouse was. Various kinds of cloth, scrolls, and wood scraps were flying through the sky. The screams of women, the cheers of men, it had drawn everyone’s attention. Although it wasn’t flashy, the TNT in the containers seemed to have fulfilled its role properly.

「Wh, wh, what, wh」

「I blew them up. There’s magic that causes explosions, right? It’s something similar to that. Well, everything in the warehouse has probably become useless」

「………A, ah」

His soul was escaping from his mouth. I wondered if he had other valuable items stored there as well. It would be lucky if he did.

「Oh, sorry. There was one more thing after all, is that alright with you?」

Without waiting for a reply, I pulled out the Government and shot the man of remarkable ability in both legs. Even I felt sorry for him so I didn’t shoot him anywhere vital. Misuranika-sama dug her claws into me in surprise.

The man stepped backwards like a robot that had run out of fuel.

「With this, I’ll leave today. I still have to go register as an adventurer. I’ll come back again tomorrow at the same time. You have until then to get ready」

I picked up the spent cartridges and left the room unhurriedly. As I was walking down the stairs, the people in the shop, whether they were customers or employees, were in an uproar and heading outside. I mixed into the crowd and disappeared into its flow. Once on the street, I stayed alert for pursuers and entered the back alley. After turning a few corners, I checked to see if it was safe.

「Hmmm, You’re pretty evil」

「Ehー Aren’t they the ones at fault?」

「Correcting evil is justice. Destroying evil is evil, isn’t it?」

「I see」

As we were having that conversation, I arrived at the dungeon.

My destination was the reception desk.

Before that, I had Misuranika-sama wait near the entrance.

「Excuse me. I want to register as an adventurer」

「Yes. I have been waiting for you」

Said Evetta-san.

「In that case, we’ll continue from where we left off last time. Please tell me the name of the god you’re contracted to」

「It’s Misuranika-sama」

The pen moved smoothly. After that, she traced her finger down the paper as she checked what she wrote.

「Please wait a moment」

Evetta got up from her seat with the documents. While being taught by another Guild employee in the back, she pasted the documents onto a scroll and shone a magical-looking light on it. She came back with a slightly happy expression. I was also happy.

「Provisional registration is completed. Two days later, before the morning bell rings, you will be given the necessary equipment and have a hands-on training. Please rendezvous here. Being late is strictly prohibited so don’t forget about it」

「Okay」

Alright, it was not quite one full step yet, but I felt like I was moving forward.

「It’s unrelated to you, Souya, but there was a magical explosion in the warehouse district. The culprit is still at large. Keep away from there as it’s dangerous」

「Okay」

For the first time today, I left the city in a good mood. I sincerely hoped that I would keep having days like this from now on.

Well, that was probably impossible.