Infinite Farmer

Tulland woke up to more plants. Most of the trees had failed, but one was beginning to grow, specifically the one he had planted in the pulp of the briar fruits. The rest of them appeared to have failed, and he confirmed that by trying to pump a charge of Quickgrow into them. It failed. They were good and dead. He put another round of Quickgrow into the successful seed, then started making his rounds on his briars.

Today was the day he cleaned some of them out. The old-style Hades Briars were of little use to him now. He kept some of the very best plants for club-making, but even those might not be needed once he had the chance to try a used-up Lunger Briar for the job.

The trees would be days, maybe even weeks, before they were large enough to matter much. But Tulland's last dream had reminded him of something. He was the kind of guy who thought most hard problems just needed a hero as their solutions. And some problems really were that way. But more often than not, Tulland had found that his tutor was right, especially as he got old enough to know the difference between fantasy and reality.

Boring is powerful. If I had to sum that old man in one sentence, it would be that.

And right in that moment, Tulland started to get confirmation that the old man was right.

Somewhere outside Tulland's enclosure, his Lunger Briars were at work. He realized a bit late that the vines he had left out by the trees would eventually grow fruits, and that those fruits would draw in animals that wanted to eat them. He wasn't getting experience from any of the kills besides that first one, but that didn't mean it was a useless thing. The fewer monsters in the woods, the farther he could go, and the more things he could find. Given enough time, he could render any distance mostly safe with briars.

Considering the fact that he didn't even know how far there was to go, that was a real possibility.

"System."

Yes?

"How do I go up floors?"

The System went quiet for a while. Tulland decided not to give it the satisfaction of talking again. It would only set the System up to make its eventual jab at Tulland a bit better.

Is this a serious question?

"Would I ask if it wasn't?"

I do not pretend to know what you think is important enough to waste my time with, these days.

"Just tell me. Or I can cut the connection."

If you did, who else could you ask?

"The Infinite's Dungeon System, I guess. Oh, damn." Tulland almost smacked his forehead. "That's the answer, right?"

Right. Now, if you don't mind, do cut that connection. I'd rather not have to listen in on you learning things any child would know if they had grown up under a properly powerful System.

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Tulland probably would have got the notification when he first arrived here if he hadn't been depending on the System from his world. It only took the slightest query aimed in the right direction to get every bit of explanation he could want.

"Well, that's easy enough," Tulland said with a smile.

I requested you banish me. Did I not?

"Fine, fine. Have a fun time."

You know I can't.

Tulland cut off the connection and got to work. He loaded up his arms with the lunging variety of briar vines, which were more than enough against Razored Lunger and, Tulland hoped, the other monsters of this floor. Then, gathering every single fruit he could manage, he went out into the world.

Now that Tulland knew that the fruits themselves would draw in monsters, he could be a lot more efficient with his vines. By now, he had a pretty good sense of how close together the briar plants could grow without robbing each other of resources too much. He walked for a few minutes, killing a few Lungers on the way, then planted three of the seeds. Then he walked a few more minutes in another direction, making a wide circle all the way back to home. By the time he was finished, he had dropped about fifty seeds, and empowered at least one out of every group with a Quickgrow.

Time was starting to have an only conditional meaning in this place. Tulland had walked a long time today and spent a lot of magic, and was now exhausted, so he slept. He woke up whenever his body was ready, and repeated the cycle. Within a few cycles, he had a couple dozen patches of plants out in the wilderness, all of which were making their own fruits, attracting their own prey, and slaughtering them without Tulland having to do a thing.

All hail the wonder of logistics! Tulland thought, more than a little loopy after a string of days walking and planting seeds with no results he was actually present for to show for it. Only through logistics can we triumph!

He didn't realize how right he was until the notifications started pouring in. With them was another pang of longing for his tutor.

It wasn't a very hard decision of where to put the points. Not only was putting a bunch of them to his mental capabilities a given just to get the skill, but the last four days had been entirely bottlenecked by his ability to regenerate his magic.

Into Spirit and Force you go, little points!

Tulland sent his points into spirit until he got the new skill, and then pushed everything else into force.

And that, Tulland knew, was probably the biggest improvement he could have possibly received. As the remote kill confirmations continued to pour in, he was fairly certain that this level had just gone from questionably beatable to an eventual cakewalk, even if it might take an awfully long time to see the fruits of that transition.

"Hey, System. Want to make a bet?"

A bet?

"A bet. A real one. Is that something you can do?"

Hardly. What would you have that I would want? And how would I take it if I did want it?

"You can destroy a skill, right?" Tulland had paid just enough attention to the Church's sessions to know that was something the System held over its apostles.

There was a pause.

I can't unless you let me.

"I'll let you if you win. One entire skill gone from my catalog. I bet you can even get something for it, right? Some reclaimed energy or something."

And what would be the terms of this bet? I would need specifics.

"I say I can beat this floor and the next within a month. And if I can't, you get what you want."

That's likely impossible. While I don't feel bad about cheating you, Tulland, or even getting you killed, I'm not a sadist.

"You're scared? Of little old me? That I can do something you don't think I can do? I couldn't do that unless I was smarter than you, System."

There was another pause, this time longer than the one before. Tulland thought that he had overplayed his hand. And then the System responded.

There would be nothing that would force you to pay up.

"Oh, hmm. Yes, I suppose that's so. And my word won't do?"

No. And neither will mine. We are both of us untrustworthy in this matter.

"Well, the only other person I even know on this plain of existence is…"

This is foolish. You cannot…

"Yes," Tulland said, grinning. His life was so cheap in this place that adding an extra element of risk hardly mattered. But for the System, it was a potential disaster. That meant he needed to do a bit extra taunting. "What? Are you scared? Of me? A mere human? The same human who you betrayed? Afraid that I'll win?"

I do not know or experience fear.

"And yet, I'm the only yes so far."

Tulland could almost hear the annoyance as the System tried to come up with a counter for that. He knew it couldn't, it knew it couldn't, and they both knew that even the System had its pride on the line here.