Inside An Adult Game As A Former Hero

Everyone has desires. Depending on how they were born and the environment they grew up in, their desires may differ, but ultimately, they are still desires.

And people want to fulfill these desires.

If there’s appetite, they will seek food to sate their hunger. If there’s greed, they will chase after money. If there’s lust, they will make efforts to beguile others with their charm.

This is by no means an immoral act.

Human civilization has developed using these desires as a driving force.

However, in the church, desires are considered sins and are taught to be kept at bay, to be given a wide berth.

Desires are never satisfied here, and if one pursues desires without restraint, one may eventually bring about their own downfall.

Ophelia fell into such a situation.

Having lived her whole life within the confines of the immaculate church walls, she stepped out into the world for the first time as a candidate for sainthood.

Unlike the church, the world was filled with all sorts of mysterious, stimulating, and pleasurable knick-knacks.

Naturally, she had no resistance to such things since she had never experienced them before, and she pursued them eagerly, just like a child chasing after a firefly.

Unaware that she was a moth diving headfirst into the flame.

Even if she realized it later, it was too late. Her wings had already caught fire, blazing into motes of ashes. She could no longer soar high in the sky. She could no longer witness the beautiful scenery.

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All that was left was living a wretched life crawling on the ground like a worm.

In such situations, people usually forked into two paths.

One was denying reality and believing they can fly again, jumping off a cliff.

Occasionally, there would be cases of them soaring again, but most end up falling to their death.

Another, accepting reality and therefore accepting a wretched life.

They may consider themselves miserable, but they can still live somewhat like a person. Perhaps they would find different happiness within that.

So, which category did Ophelia belong to?

If she were to categorize, she would be closer to the first case, but it was slightly different from that.

“It’s okay… It’s okay…”

She was throwing herself toward a freshly stoked kindle, not a cliff.

“It’ll be alright…”

Ophelia scratched herself. In her heart, she wanted to whip herself, but there was no soundproofing magic to ward off the lashes. Even if she wanted to ask for such magic, it was difficult to ask since Eri had been unusually depressed lately.

That’s why she scratched herself with her nails.

Her arms. Her chest. Her stomach. Her waist. Anywhere her hands could reach.

As a result, there was no place on her body without wounds, and the blood and torn garb clung to the wounds hideously.

“Hero won’t leave me…”

Tears constantly streamed down her dark green eyes that had sunk into darkness.

“It was the same back then…”

Before the Evil Heavenly King descended in Lupus.

When the Archbishop, charmed by a nubile nun, had proposed her as a candidate for sainthood, her hero had firmly refused.

He even tried to comfort her, who was anxious.

So there won’t be anything different this time either.

Ophelia reassured herself with these thoughts, calming her restless heart.

“Ophelia, it’s okay to let go if it’s getting difficult.”

It didn’t take her long to realize that it was needless.

“…What?”

Ophelia froze at Cloud’s words, which were like a bolt from the blue.

* * *

I know what it’s like to be a “Hero” while not being one.

Ophelia is not suitable for a Saintess Candidate. It’s not about her abilities or character being insufficient. It’s just that her personality doesn’t match the station of a Saintess.

Being a Saintess warrants a lot of patience, but Ophelia is… well, she has a very free-spirited personality.

She eats what she wants and buys what she wants.

I got to know her better as we spent time together.

‘Besides, she wasn’t keen to attain the position of the Saintess in the game.’

I said what I said because I was afraid of the aftermath and had no other choice.

Honestly, I think she’s still the same now.

People don’t change so easily, and lately, I haven’t seen Ophelia going to church much.

Perhaps she hit rock bottom in her faith after the previous incident.

If she doesn’t want it herself, I have no intention of forcing her into the role of a Saintess Candidate.

‘As long as I look into that she doesn’t get bullied and finds a more skeptic job in the church, she would be ‘fine.

Or she can renounce her life as a nun and live as a civilian.

She would lose her divine power, but as long as she lives moderately accordingly, no harm would come to her.

Ophelia looks pretty and has a pretty decent personality…

Well, she’ll live comfortably.

At least it would be much better than living with incessant stress like now.

…so that’s why I said what I said with those thoughts in mind.

“H-Hero, what are you saying…?”