Reincarnated as a Phoenix

Chapter 31 – Bandit Massacre

(Temporary Perspective Change)

“Wh-, what the hell is going on?”

Waking up sitting up against a log, I can’t help but get panicked from all the destruction around me. I quickly pull myself up of the ground and start walking around the hellhole I’ve woken in.

I know I shouldn’t have been sleeping since it’s my guard shift but none of the soldiers ever come this far into the forest so what’s the point? This is a perfect place for a large hideout yet why are we under attack? We’ve been purposely avoiding robbing the knights in fear of retaliation and now, this is happening.

The entire camp we’ve spent months building and turning into a raiders paradise is surrounded in flame, every direction fire burns into the night sky. People are trying to fill buckets of water to try and put it out but nothing’s working.

“Where the hell is the fire coming from?”

“It’s a bloody dragon”

A dragon? Why the fuck is there a dragon over here? Their supposed to be extinct, aren’t they? That comrade who just spoked to me has started to run off as well now.

I can’t help but look depressed and shocked while staring at everything and everyone, all that work we’ve done robbing and raiding has just gone in a split second.

“Shit! There’s intruders by the fro-”

I look to where another one of my comrades was shouting from and see a bright sword that looks like it doesn’t belong in this world sticking through his chest.

Then, without warning, I hear a sinister laugh from the dark heavens and see a spewing flame of fire heading towards my direction, I don’t think I can avoid it.

“What is hap-

__________

“Muhahahaha!”

Watching all the little humans flee from my flames is absolutely brilliant, there’s nothing they can do except run around like headless chickens. Some have tried shooting arrows towards me but it’s beyond pointless since they can barely see me when I’m not spewing flame.

I’ve already lit up all the buildings and most of the tents, now I’m just looking for any free kills. It’s not that easy to get them though since my flame isn’t as strong as I would prefer it to be, I do have to try and preserve it to make it last longer. I’m getting way too many hitmarkers at the moment with my weakened beak flamethrower.

‘Aesa, magic’

[<32% remaining>]

I’ll keep this up for another minute or two and then join my party, they’ve started wreaking havoc as well now.

Spreading more fire over the camp for more than enough time now, I start flying my way back to my party and plan on making a cool entrance. Unfortunately, I can’t do a superhero landing in this form, I’ll just have to land on one of the bandits who is currently trying to flank the party.

(Bandit) “Arg-”

‘I actually feel sorry for the guy I just crushed. Oh well’

Currently, my party is surrounded by at least two dozen bandits and are tearing through the bandits like a knife through butter, I’ve just landed a little bit away from them in the camp itself.

“You will repent and all pay for your sins heathens”

“The royal knights would have a field day with you incompetent bastards”

“…”

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The sight of three people fighting together was actually pretty cool, the priestess was using her huge summoned sword crashing into bandits left and right, the knight was fighting slightly more tactical and only slashing when he needed and for the blind woman, she was the most impressive out of the lot. Her stance looked a tiny bit carefree but every time a bandit even got close to her, her speed with the sword was out of this world, you could barely see her blade move through the air.

Of course, the way I join the fight is going to be slightly obnoxious. I’m still in a slightly serious mood but seeing these lot not struggle and fight with ease has relaxed me a lot.

So, to join my party, I charge head first into the fight crashing through several bandits and trampling them with my weight.

“Ahh-”

“Dam-”

“*Coug-*”

I can’t help but give a grin as Ikarus the bulldozer runs through the bandits, you really can find fun in something you enjoy, even if that enjoyment is from questionable methods.

(Petra) “Behind you”

Listening to her, I see a bandit just about to swing his sword towards me. Like a donkey or horse, I kick behind me and send the guy flying away with more than enough time to spare though.

I find it a bit ironic that the person who is blind can detect better than the other two, I still would have noticed him anyway but it seems my protectors aren’t all that competent. Well, they are, it’s probably because these bandits hold next to no threat towards us.

“Oh, Ikarus-sama”

“There you are”

Oh, those two didn’t even notice me, they were too focused in combat, fair enough.

All four of us are now together, it’s time for this party to do some kewl shit!

I start using the last of my flamethrower getting the bandits ahead of me nice and toasty while the others are fighting their own battles.

“Nat, to your left!”

(Nathan) “Got it”

Nathan blocks a bandit’s attack while Charlotte counters for him stabbing him with her blade, I only notice this since my bandits have now turned to ash.

These two really fight well together, one blocks and the other counters, it works surprisingly well. As for the blind woman, she really doesn’t have a need for such team work fighting, I’m yet to see her even attempt to make a block, she just slices them down before they even have a chance.

Then something unexpected happens, an arrow flies towards me while I’m about to start focusing on someone else.

“Argh! Who the hell did that!?”

I start looking around and see an archer a slight distance behind the other bandits, I’m not letting him do that again. The arrow wasn’t even that painful, it literally feels like a small pinch. I’m still pissed regardless so I’m going to do something slightly reckless.

“I’m the juggernaut bitches!”

I charge forward and all of the bandits ahead of me jump to the side in fear of getting stampeded by me, doing this should actually provide some assist for my party since the enemies are on the floor as well now.

It takes a split second but I’ve already closed the gap to the archer, he now realizes he shouldn’t have shot the giant chicken and should’ve aimed for someone else.

“There you are!”

“Wai-”

I give a powerful kick and he’s unable to do anything about it other than get thrown away like a ragdoll, I’ve got that bastard who thought shooting me was a good idea.

Then something else happens during the fight, I see another archer a little bit away from me aiming an arrow towards my group. The archer releases the arrow and it flies true towards my party.

However, it’s stopped by the blind woman’s blade slicing the arrow mid-flight from a quick slash, that cultivation system makes her blindness mostly pointless except from extreme range it seems.

(Petra) “Ikarus, some help”

She’s unable to kill the archer right since she’s fighting someone right now.

I can just about hear her from this range so I make my way to the archer who is reloading another shot and before he gets a chance to shoot again, every bone in his body breaks from me jumping into him. Kicking him would have been too nice a death.

That was the last archer left standing and now everything looks like it’s starting to die down, there’s only a handful of bandits actually still alive, my party has really dealt with this many people in this short amount of time.

“Fuck fuck fuck!”

“What do we do? What the hell do we do?”

“We run you idiots; we’ll rebuild in a different forest”

Out of the survivors, seven bandits are still standing and are ready to fight. They would be ready to fight if they hadn’t just run around my party and started fleeing the camp running as fast as they could.

“No you don’t! Get back here you bastards!”

I was starting my chase for the free EXP when the priestess lightly grabs my wing stopping me while moving from following them, she needs to say something right now.

“Ikarus-sama, killing retreating heathens isn’t a job you should burden yourself with…”

‘She’s probably right, killing people who are retreating might be considered a war crime’

“… it’s the job of the Lord and his faithful servant”

As soon as she finishes speaking, she aims her sword towards the retreating bandits. A few seconds later, all that remains is destroyed trees from the death laser, it truly is a wicked sight.

I can’t help but think she’s such a hypocrite, it might be her God is a really bad influence on her. All she’s really done is stolen my EXP but judging from that display, I think I’ll let it slide this time.

She really dislikes heathens, it’s a bit stupid that she’s not even using it in right context but I’m not pedantic enough to say something about it, yet.

…

A quick silence happens once everything has calmed, maybe everyone is letting their adrenaline calm, perhaps no one has any idea what to do or say next. I definitely have an idea what to say though.

“I don’t like to big myself up but seriously doe, wasn’t that freaking epic!? I must have looked similar to rampaging dragon from your perspectives”

(Petra) “It was impressive Ikarus”

(Nathan) “Yeah Ikarus, you really gave them hell”

“…”

I don’t get a response from Charlotte, I think she didn’t hear me or maybe thought I might be getting a little ahead of myself, it’s probably that, Gods don’t like pride or whatever than sin is. Thinking about that type of thing, I’ve got a pretty badass quote to follow myself up.

“I don’t enjoy killing but when done righteously, it’s just a chore like any other”

“I agree Ikarus-sama, killing isn’t great but when done for the Lord, it is just like a chore”

She just ruined by badass quote from the burned man, no one was supposed to respond to me. Of course, she has to respond to that and not my other comment though.

(Petra) “Have I heard that somewhere before?”

Don’t get exited Ikarus, she’s probably mistaken, no one gets my quotes in this world.

“Doubt it, it depends if you were into western RPGs. Oh, it also had guns in it”

“It does slightly ring a bell but I really don’t think it would be from something like that”

Oh, she might get it then, she doesn’t seem all that confused from me saying RPG, I still doubt she gets any of it though. The other two in my party haven’t got a clue what I’m on about, it’s actually a little funny looking at their confused faces.

Oh, I don’t think I ever said anything about the time periods between us.

It’s obvious she’s from modern Earth as well but must have been reincarnated here hundreds of years ago, I’m unsure on how it actually works but it’s clear time in this world flows different from Earth. It matters little since I have no idea how or if I could actually get back but still, it’s just a random thought.

Thinking about it, would I return to Earth if I could? I don’t mean permanently return, I would never do that but if I could return for like a day or a holiday, would I? I probably would, I could stack up on so much food, buy hundreds of burgers or fast-food meals and keep them in my storage for when I want to pig out. Fried chicken as well, ah, can’t forget about doughnuts as well. Mmmm doughnuts, urghhh…

I’m getting distracted now, I’ll start drooling in a minute, there’s still more to do in this fiery camp.

“What are we gonna do about those lot?”

I point my wing to the half-naked slaves now awake up and about, there’s about eight of them and they look a bit shellshocked from what’s just happened. I’m pretty sure I didn’t kill any of them by accident while I was doing my thing so I’m pretty happy right now.

All of them have noticed my bird body as well. Thankfully, none of them are children so the fear of being eaten doesn’t exist, it is annoying that more humans have witnessed my phoenix form so trying to remain confidential might be asking too much.

I’m not exactly going to kill any of them for seeing me like this though, I really don’t care all that much about my form being kept hidden, it just might prove an issue down the line if I show myself to the wrong person.

“We should guide them to a city to ensure their safety”

I can’t help but get pissed at Charlotte, we are definitely NOT doing that.

“No chance priestess, we’re not guiding them to a city, the closest is the capital, right? That’s a stupid distance away and will take weeks on foot since I can’t carry everyone”

(Nathan) “We did pass a fort on the way here, the knights stationed there will have to help”

A better suggestion but it still isn’t ideal.

“That will still take at least a week on foot, probably two, maybe even three if those lot are slow”

Of course, I’m going to get a little annoyed from all this, we’re here to hunt bandits, not lead the slaves to safety. Didn’t Moses do something like that through the desert? Oh, I don’t care about religious stories, I need a more attractive solution right now.

“We could just guide them to the main road and split there, it will definitely be quicker”

Charlotte gets quickly concerned from Petra’s suggestion though.

“Who’s to say they won’t get prayed on by heathens on the way back to civilization?”

“Weren’t we here to hunt bandits? I’m not opposed to helping people but we’ve already done enough just by releasing them. All we’re doing is providing needless charity at this point”

“God rewards those who help people in need”

“If you have to bring God up to prove your point, you’ve already lost the discussion. There is a difference between generosity and charity priestess, God has nothing to do with either”

I can already tell these two women are going to have a big clash of personalities at some point, it’s unfortunate but not everyone has the same view on life. Thankfully, this dictatorship is run by me so I get the last word, I don’t like being bossy but I really don’t spend weeks guiding people to safety.

“Can you two just stop for a second? I’m sorry priestess but I’m in agreement with her, there should be more than enough supplies and equipment to get back by themselves. If they don’t, I can just provide them with some stuff from storage”

She looks a bit disheartened with my reasoning but she understands my point, it’s a good thing that Nathan really couldn’t give too shits about most things, he’s a lot more open minded with everything. As for Petra, I think our mindsets might be a little too similar, I guess it might be down to both of us being from Earth.

(Ikarus) “Well… anyway, let’s sort out some stuff for those lot and get moving, the fire is starting to dwindle now so we should be able to look around for supplies now”

I’ll check out my level at a later date, there is no way I haven’t gained a shit tonne of EXP from all that murder, hehe.

[<-User is forgetting something>]

‘What am I forgetting? Oh, the arrow’

I might’ve forgot to mention something, the arrow kinda hit my rump, my backside, my keister. There are dozens of ways I can describe it but it needs to go, I don’t think any of my party members even realized I got hit. Can’t blame them, it’s pretty much out of sight anyway.

“Can one of you give me a hand please? I’ve erm… kinda got something stuck in me down below”

Wait! I know how that sounds, damn it…