Chapter 33 - Under The Weeping Tree - Part 1
AARYN
Aaryn let himself smile... until he caught Elreth's expression. He inhaled, trying desperately to scent what that meant—the emotions chased each other across her features too quickly for him to catch.
But one thing was certain. She wasn't happy.
"Alpha-male bullshit," she growled. "Dargyn, go home. I need to speak with Aaryn."
Gwyn gripped her hand then in an expression of support, and Aaryn's eyebrows popped up as Elreth turned and gave her hug. He'd thought Gwyn would never encourage Elreth towards him. And he'd been sure Elreth was kind of tired of Gwyn. But he couldn't fault her for the choice. Gwyn was loyal to a fault—and very steady under pressure.
She also had a tenacity that he wished was applied anywhere but himself.
"Goodnight," Elreth said to Gwyn as Dargyn slunk away to the staircase to leave through the market. "And thank you."
Gwyn nodded and gave a flat smile, then she looked at Aaryn, her eyes unreadable.
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As soon as she turned away, Aaryn finally looked at Elreth, who stared back at him, her blue eyes large pools of confusion, anger, and fear.
Aaryn swallowed. "Can we… go?" he whispered.
She nodded and let him take her hand and lead her to the stairs behind him and out the door into the dark night before she yanked out of his grip, hissed, "I'll see you at the Tree," then leapt into beast form and ran.
Aaryn sighed, but it was for the best. She would be calmer if she'd had a chance to be alone. Tired as he was, he pushed into a jog on the trails so she wouldn't have to wait a long time for him.
And as he ran, he prayed.
*****
He'd barely parted the leaves and blossom curtain on the weeping tree to step underneath, barely caught sight of her pacing the dirt near the trunk, before she turned and launched herself at him.
"How could you? How COULD YOU?" she snarled, shoving his chest.
He caught her wrists, and held them, but only to keep her from harming him. He understood her anger—and her need vent it.
"Elreth—"
She pulled out of his grip. "You told me my whole life that I was destined for this! You applauded my dreams and encouraged them. You shared them! You said I was the one to bring the Anima to integration with the disformed—that was you, Aaryn! You said you shared my dreams. You said you'd be there to help!"
"I know, and I will, but—"
"You've said you wanted me dominant for years, and now I am, and you're going to abandon me?!"
"Of course not!"
"I am trying to bring our people together—all our people. Including you and the others. Trying to bridge the gap and I gave you the chance to be a huge part of that and you just… what? Didn't care enough?"
"No!"
She snorted. "There is no one in my mind better than you to do this job, Aaryn. So why? Why would you embarrass me that way? Why would you undermine me like that?!"
"I did not intend to undermine you," he growled, his hands clenching at his sides. He had to stay calm. He had to—
"Is this about me mating with Dargyn? Is that how petty you've become?"
"WHAT?!" he snarled, his own fury breaking free. "You really believe I would—? I don't want to be your Cohort, Elreth. I don't want to be… restricted that way. Is that so hard to understand?"
She gaped. "This is… male pride? Are you serious? I thought you of all people—you're saying you don't want to be under the authority of a female?"
"Are you fucking serious, Elreth?"
"Yes, I'm serious! You left me there! In front of everyone! You humiliated me!" she shoved his chest again and he caught her wrists.
"What about me? What about what you were doing to me?" he snarled.
"What? HONORING YOU?" She threw her hands up so he'd let her go.
"You were putting me in a box, Elreth, and you know it," he hissed through his teeth.
"HOW? Why wouldn't you want to be in a position to influence the people—to show them what the disformed can do?"
"I didn't say I didn't want that, I said I don't want to be your Cohort," he snarled.
"You're not making sense!"
"Your Cohort, Elreth. Yours! Not anyone else's. I do not want to be YOUR Cohort!"
"Why not?"
"BECAUSE I WANT MORE FROM YOU!" His heart stuttered, then roared ahead, racing. He'd said it. He'd done it. She was finally going to have to face it…
But Elreth stopped, blinking. She wasn't afraid. She was confused. He could smell it.
She opened her mouth, but hesitated. "I don't… I don't understand," she said more quietly, her eyes scanning back and forth like she was searching for something. "What could I possibly give you that was more than that?"
Aaryn's mouth fell open.
Deep down, he'd always assumed she kind of did know about his feelings, but wanted to ignore them. That she chose denial because she didn't want him the way he wanted her. That she'd known what she was doing when she tried to appoint him as Cohort.
Was it possible she really was that oblivious?
"Elreth… please…" he said, his voice gentle and pleading. He met her startled gaze and just… let himself feel. Let himself wallow in the warmth and joy that spun in his chest every time she smiled. Let himself breathe her scent that was his favorite smell in the world—grass, the blue flowers that only bloomed in spring, and something that was just… her. He let himself feel his certainty that she was the one for him—and his pain that she couldn't see it.
He let it all wash over him until he was forced to suck in a breath to try to ease the ache that consumed him.
And he saw the second his meaning entered her mind, and confusion gave way to shock.
And he prayed.