The Main Characters That Only I Know

Chapter 1:

My mother told me.

No matter how harsh and difficult reality is, you should have big dreams.

If you pursue your dreams, you will someday become the protagonist of your life.

I was naive enough to believe those words as if they were carved in stone.

Even when the era of collectors ended, and the apocalypse came to this world.

Even when I endured that hellish place for almost 10 years, I did not lose my faith.

Stupidly.

“Cough.”

A sharp pain pierced my abdomen, and blood flowed from my mouth. 

The bitter smell of blood irritated my nose. 

It was a smell that I had been sick of since the world changed, but this time it was different.

This blood was mine.

‘Is this the end?’

I instinctively realized it. 

I had overcome countless dangers until now, but that was also coming to an end.

If I had just been stabbed in the abdomen, I could have healed it with [Story of Healing] or a powerful potion with the same effect. 

But this wound was pierced by a cursed spear. 

No ordinary treatment would work.

The only possible thing was a rare elixir that could remove all wounds and status effects.

‘But I don’t have anything like that.’

Maybe ‘he’ had it. It was possible for him, who had swept up all the benefits as if he was chosen by the world after it changed.

But.

‘He won’t use his precious elixir on me.’

I knew it better than anyone else, because I had watched him closely. 

He wouldn’t save me, who had become useless to him.

As soon as my thoughts ended, a group of people appeared, stepping on the debris of the collapsed building.

There were four of them. 

One man and three women.

Familiar faces. 

People who I thought were my comrades, who had gone through hardships together.

They still had traces of the battle on them, and they were full of scratches. 

But they had no fatal injuries.

They found me leaning against the rubble and slowly approached me.

Even though I was dying, there was no sign of concern in their eyes. 

No, there was only one person who looked at me with pity, who I thought was close to me.

I hated myself for being touched by such a look. 

How badly have I been treated?

“…”

The leader of the group. 

The protagonist who received the blessing of the world looked down at me.

I couldn’t feel any emotion in his eyes. 

We weren’t close friends, but we had been together for several years. 

It was so cold that it gave me goosebumps.

“Are you here?”

In the end, I was the first to open my mouth. 

The curse engraved on the wound corroded my whole body, and it was hard to move my mouth. 

Cough! 

Just by saying one word, I spat out a mouthful of blood.

“…You.”

The one who glanced at me opened his mouth.

“If you hadn’t interfered, I would have taken him down easily.”

But his words were not concerned about me.

Rather, they were closer to blame.

Yeah. I didn’t expect anything anyway. 

Rather, I couldn’t help but laugh when he said exactly what I expected.

“Heh heh.”

“What’s so funny?”

“No, just. You’re saying exactly what I thought you would say.”

“…”

He was right.

Even if I hadn’t interfered in the fight, the man in front of me could have defeated the knight who spread disaster.

But it would have taken much longer for him to do so. 

And how much trouble would the fight between beings beyond human limits cause around them? 

Did he even know?

No, he must have known. 

But he wouldn’t have stopped anyway. 

He wouldn’t care how many people around him died as long as he achieved his goal. 

That’s how this psychopath was.

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I rolled my eyes and looked around. 

The dead black land, the blood-red sky, and the swirling wind turned Seoul, which once shone brightly, into ruins long ago. 

I could see people moving around in the gaps.

People who would have died from the aftermath if I hadn’t interfered in the fight.

They survived in the end.

But not me.

“Cough cough.”

They survived, but on the contrary, I was dying. 

It was ironic. 

Damn it. 

I stuck to that psychopath to survive and suffered so much to get here.

And yet, and yet.

I got swept away by my emotions at the last moment.

I asked him with my last strength.

“You. Do you have an elixir?”

“Yes.”

He didn’t even bother to hide it. 

He knew it too. 

That I was sure of it, even if he said no or didn’t answer.

“And you won’t use it on me.”

“…Yeah.”

“That’s too much.”

“The value of an elixir is infinite. It’s my spare life for the dangers that will come in the future. But you are not a human worth using an elixir on.”

Value.

That word contained a lot of things.

It was something I couldn’t have, and it was also the standard by which he judged and evaluated everything in the world and decided whether to live or die. 

He was a psychopath who did such things without hesitation.

But ironically, that’s why his popularity soared.

“Really, what a shitty world.”

I muttered regretfully and looked up at the sky. 

Above the blood-red sky, sparkling stars were visible. 

And they were all watching the man.

The celestial beings with a high heavenly rank.

The beings who watched the humans struggle as a game, and gave us trials and rewards.

They liked him. 

They were fascinated by his rebellious way of doing things, and they didn’t care about a loser like me.

It was the same now. 

There was no spirit who mourned my death.

They never had any interest in me in the first place.

“You’re such a shitty guy.”

“Wasn’t it your will to stick to me out of necessity?”

“That’s true.”

I had to survive first.

When the apocalypse came to the world, it was a stroke of luck that I found him. 

I thought he would make it to the end of the world. 

And I did everything I could to cling to him.

He knew it, and I knew it. 

We were just traveling together for a while out of necessity.

That’s why. 

I wasn’t angry that he left me to die.

I was the one who approached him first, knowing what kind of person he was.

“Isn’t that too harsh?”

I just said it was shitty, but one of the women with a fierce expression stepped forward and scolded me.

Yeah. 

We had bickered a few times before. 

She hated me for clinging to him without any ability.

But couldn’t she be more generous on my last journey?

“Stop.”

He cut off her words and asked me.

“Just one thing. Why did you do that?”

“Cough. Do what?”

“Interfering in the fight. You should have provided information as usual, and stayed back and waited for the fight to end, right? But this time it was different. What you did was almost suicidal. It wasn’t beneficial for you at all.”

Well, it was. 

I knew how to fight, but I wasn’t as great as him who was chosen, so I always stayed in the rear. 

The only thing I did was gather information around him and deliver it diligently.

He fought. 

I scouted and informed.

That was the tacit rule that kept us together.

So he asked me.

Why did I break the rule?

“Why, huh…”

I chuckled and answered.

“Just, I couldn’t stand it anymore.”

“Couldn’t stand it?”

“Heh heh. Cough! Yeah. I couldn’t stand it. How long do I have to live like this? Just, just tired. Of clinging to you, of living like this. That this was all there was to me, that this was my limit. Just that.”

Yeah. 

The reason I interfered in his fight wasn’t because of a simple whim.

What motivated me was just a small dissatisfaction that I had been harboring for a long time.

It just exploded like a volcano this time.

I wanted to be a great person.

I had such a dream, and I could be proud that I worked hard for it.

But the world belonged to those who were chosen, and I couldn’t fit in there. 

So I decided to live as a supporting role at least, without dying…

“It was something I couldn’t do well.”

That’s why I got into this mess by getting into a fight that didn’t suit me.

To find my own value.

“You…”

He noticed the survivors around us and narrowed his eyes.

“Just, you wanted to save those guys…”

“No.”

I immediately cut off his words.

“That’s not it. Just… Just because I was tired.”

“Don’t lie.”

“A lie? You don’t even know enough about me to say that for sure, do you? You never even cared.”

“…”

He didn’t deny my words. 

Because they were true.

But I was surprised. 

Could it be that he, who was insensitive to others, had such a sharp insight into my feelings? 

Yeah. 

Come to think of it, he was smart too.

Ding.

Suddenly, a loud notification sound echoed in the air, and a being appeared out of nowhere.

A guy wearing a black robe that looked fiery, with a face covered by dark shadows and red eyes glowing.

A teller, a being who led us to this apocalypse and showed our plight to the spirits instead of us.

“Very good. You have survived splendidly beyond our expectations.”

He didn’t care about the people’s condition at all, and just kept talking. 

His words were nothing special. 

He said that we had survived this trial, and we should prepare for the next one. 

And he also added that the end of the trials was not far away.

Even though many people died in this trial, his voice was emotionless.

They never cared about human deaths in the first place. 

They were just entertainment for the spirits. 

It had always been like that since the world changed like this.

At first, we were angry and annoyed at them.

But we realized that it was pointless.

“Go away.”

I told him in front of me.

“Just go. Take your followers with you.”

“What? Followers?!”

One of the women reacted to my words again. 

Whew. 

She couldn’t let anything go lightly.

“Are they not followers? What, should I call them your queens?”

“You!”

“Sister. Stop it. We don’t need to listen to that man. Let’s just go. It’s a waste of time.”

Another woman who couldn’t stand it intervened and stopped her. 

The woman who was making a fuss glared at me as if she wanted to kill me, then turned her head away and left. 

The other two who were watching the situation also quietly backed away.

“What are you doing? Aren’t you going too?”

“Yeah. Mr. Do-yoon. Let’s ignore that man and go. It’s all his fault.”

Yeah. 

Choi Do-yoon. 

Go ahead. 

Leave with them who adore and love you sincerely.

You always did that. 

You moved without saying anything, and following you was entirely my job.

“…”

But for some reason, Choi Do-yoon didn’t seem to leave easily.

Could it be that he felt some kind of resentment for me at the last moment?

It was funny. 

He hardly had any emotions, and he showed ‘hesitation’ here.

Sigh. Sigh.

The curse spread to my lungs, and it was hard to breathe. 

I was lucky enough to have some power, so I didn’t die right away. 

If I had been an ordinary person, I would have died instantly.

I didn’t want to show him how I died. 

This death was only mine. 

I hated having spectators.

So I spat out what might be my last words with all my strength.

“Choi Do-yoon. Go ahead. You’re not the one to stop here.”

“…”

“Or what? Are you going to use an elixir on me?”

I deliberately mocked him. 

His expression was unreadable as he met my eyes.

But one thing was certain, he was in an emotional state that I had never seen before.

‘Yeah. You’re human after all.’

How long had it been?

Choi Do-yoon finally turned his back on me without saying anything.

As always.

The only difference this time was that I couldn’t follow him anymore.

‘Goodbye.’

It was easier to leave without regret. 

That’s what I wanted. 

He knew that too, so he turned his back without saying anything.

It was his kindness for the first and last time.

Time passes.

Choi Do-yoon left. 

His destination was the dimensional gate to the next trial.

The survivors who were watching from afar also followed him one by one. 

They left with inflated expectations, without knowing what awaited them at the end.

The people who survived thanks to me. 

But the people who didn’t know it was my doing.

They followed a man’s tail without knowing how to survive.

None of them looked at me.

Really.

“How pathetic.”

I didn’t do this for something like that, but I couldn’t help feeling bitter.

Cough.

Blood that was more than what I had spat out so far came up my throat.

I felt the curse reaching my heart. 

My vision was blurry, and the sensation in my arms and legs faded.

‘This is it.’

I failed to become the protagonist.

In this world, and in my life, I was not the protagonist.

All I could do was follow the chosen protagonist’s halo and cling to him.

That’s what I lived for.

I despaired and raged at the reality that didn’t even give me a chance.

But still, I accepted it.

I lived.

Hoping for paradise at the end of this life.

‘What did I live for…?’

I squeezed out my last strength and raised my right hand. 

I couldn’t feel it, so I didn’t know if I raised it or not.

Something was moving in my blurred vision, so I must have raised it.

‘If I had another chance.’

I reached out to the stars in the sky.

‘If I could correct this regret.’

I tried to grasp something that couldn’t be caught.

‘Then, I want to live a different life from now.’

The dream I had at first.

The dream I gave up now.

More than others.

Higher up.

To the point where no one would envy me, and where I could be proud of myself.

‘Such a valuable life…’

I wanted to live.

I wanted to live.

Life drained from my body.

My consciousness sank deep into the sea of unconsciousness.

‘Ah.’

Just before I closed my eyes in the blurred vision.

The last thing I saw was.

A golden light slowly descending towards me.