Chapter 25: Chapter 25: Nightmare
Unaware of Bhairav's actions after he had left and come to his senses, Jash lied through his teeth to his family. Despite guilt gnawing at his heart, he maintained a calm facade.
Fortunately, he at least got to sleep comfortably and peacefully after they supported him—or at least that was how it was supposed to have gone.
Apparently, Jash had a nightmare.
Not really a nightmare. More like snippets of memories associated with his previous—Bhairav's life.
It was difficult to distinguish the two, however, it wouldn't be right to call them the same either.
But if Bhairav were here, he wouldn't hesitate to call them one and the same.
After all, Jash's personality was in one way or another influenced by his wishes for a stable, peaceful, and easy life from the system.
That was exactly what Jash got.
However, he would remain unaware of it for the longest time, as he was the one in the dark about most things.
Bhairav's presence lingered in the back of his mind, a constant reminder of his past.
Back to his fleeting dream as he slept in his room, his mother worriedly looking over him.
...
Looking at the countless scenes of wielding all kinds of weapons—sword, knife, dagger, bow, spear, claws, knuckles, fist, legs, bones...
Each weapon felt like an extension of his will, wielded solely as a tool for the purpose of survival.
Naturally, such a weird sight would scare many, but they were just snippets of different scenes to Jash.
He didn't even have any background information, only looking at the hideous demons and vile humans being butchered from first person perspective.
Yet, there was a haunting familiarity to each image.
Without any pause, he continued to see the instances spanning ten years until the final one, where he fought the demon king and even his death in battle.
The final battle was a blur of violence, despair, pain, relief, grief, acceptance, and practiced techniques.
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Luckily, he didn't feel any of those memories as vividly as his first experience, or he might have felt like dying from all the pain.
However, the death remained the last memory after most were skipped, waking him up with a shocker. His heart raced as he struggled to separate dream from reality.
...
"Haa... Haaa...."
"I... I-I am a...alive..."
Jash barely muttered, while gasping for breath, as the scene of his heart being pierced was too much for his fragile mentality.
However, a pair of hands embraced him from behind, bringing him to the present.
"It's fine, Jash, it's fine," muttered Sera to placate his uneasy heart.
Hearing his mother's gentle tone alongside her warm embrace, he felt his heart rate lower after the cold sweat drenching his clothes evaporated because of Sera.
"T-thanks mom," mumbled Jash as he closed his eyes for a few seconds, wishing to spend more time like this.
It truly kept him away from all the burdens, bearing heavily on his mind.
Yet confusion clouded his mind as he thought, 'But... why did I wake up like that? Why does my chest hurt...?'
Surprisingly, he couldn't even remember what he dreamt or what went wrong.
Jash decided not to linger on it as he already had a plethora of information he needed to sort out.
And the first on his list was accepting his past life and sorting out his complicated emotions.
Awakening, planning for his future, and everything else could be left for later.
However, he needed his mother to give him some space to do anything of the sort, making him wonder, 'Just what do I ask mom to leave?'
Unable to come up with a plausible reason to be left alone, another dilemma overwhelmed him.
Hopefully, he wouldn't have to make up blatant lies or useless excuses, as she would most likely sense his intent and lie.
She was his mother, for god's sake!
No way she couldn't see through his amateurish attempts.
He didn't know much about such things, but Bhairav's experience with lying to his mother frightened him.
'Truly, if not for all this stupid reincarnation thingy, I wouldn't mind continuing to live the way I used to...'
Recalling his absurd ending in the novel, a cold shiver ran down his spine.
'I die, only for that trashy protagonist to get my sister as a heroine! What kind of author comes up with such a wretched plot?'
'That protagonist be damned! Who the hell does he think he is to get Caera!?'
Jash couldn't bring himself to believe about reincarnating in a novel, but did it matter?
Wasn't there a saying along the lines of
Precaution is better than cure.
'And what were you on? To read a harem novel!?'
Still, that didn't mean he wouldn't berate his past self, or Bhairav, for reading a harem novel.
It just didn't sit well with Bhairav's personality he grasped.
Waking him up from his loathing thoughts were a few muffled syllables.
"...h..."
"...Ash..."
"...Jash..."
Bringing him out of his reverie was Sera, making him realize his mistake.
'Damn! This isn't the time for this! I can't afford to get sidetrac–'
"JASH!"
Sera finally had enough and shouted his name. It was enough for him to go into a daze once, but to awaken from it momentarily before returning again?
Her worries overtook her emotional side, causing her to shout a little too loudly for convenience, resulting in Jash looking at her with a dumbfounded expression.
Too worried about Jash and any potential remnants of the curse or dark magic, she didn't seem to notice as she bombarded him with questions.
"Jash, are you fine?"
"What happened?"
"Why do you keep going in a daze?"
"Tell me, if you feel the slightest discomfort!"
"You need to..."
Unable to even comprehend his mother's rapid questions along with how she shook him, he gave up trying to do anything.
'Ugh. Stop! Please, mom! Stop! I am really fine!' Jash thought inwardly, unable to open his mouth as he feared instead of words, something else might flow out.
...
Only after making Jash answer every single question of hers and checking him multiple times did Sera relax, allowing Jash to breathe freely.
Unfortunately, he had too much to think about at the moment.
His kid brain had already changed and molted due to its neuroplasticity.
It was something Jash had never even heard about!
If not for learning about it through Bhairav's memories, he doubted he'd ever find out about the human body with such precision.
'Ugh.... That's not important right now...'
Shaking off the useless thoughts, he finally spoke, "Mom, can you leave me alone for some time? I feel like I need some alone time to think things over..."
Jash's gray eyes averted meeting Sera's narrowed red ones, but she reluctantly nodded and left wordlessly.
"Well, that was anticlimactic," mumbled Jash, watching his mother leave without any drama.
"Haa... Whatever... I don't know anymore..."
In the end, Jash finally had time to accept his situation, only if he could.
As battling through the various thoughts and memories lingering in his mind wouldn't be easy.
However, everything came to a screeching halt as a sudden pain assaulted his brain, altering its connections once again.
Thankfully, he was alone when it started or...