The System Mistook Me for a Cat

There weren't many cats at No. 5 High School.

The school cats had been neutered early on and were gradually adopted by faculty members over the years. Now only three cats remained as permanent residents: Little Black, Black-faced Calico, and a white long-haired Persian cat. They stayed at school because their personalities weren't suitable for adoption.

The cats often received food from people, but there was one place they weren't allowed to enter - the school's small zoo.

Of course, the zoo had an official name: the "Nature Hall."

On the first day of school, Three-Five-Five accompanied Chu Tingwu out the door. Chu Tingwu jumped over the railing from above, while Three-Five-Five easily slipped through from below - the railing gaps could only keep humans out, not cats.

Three-Five-Five escorted her to the classroom before beginning its patrol of the school.

Although it was a house cat, during Chu Tingwu's military training period, Three-Five-Five seemed to have already established itself among the school's three cats. Apart from not joining them for meals in the cafeteria or accepting food from others, it wasn't much different from the school cats.

This led to the principal mistaking the tortoiseshell cat for another stray when he saw it passing by, and he was about to instruct the maintenance staff to catch it for neutering.

The tortoiseshell ignored humans and greeted the other cats, then settled down on the gymnasium door opposite the Nature Hall, swishing its tail while staring at the building in the distance.

Chu Tingwu had already entered the classroom.

Half the class was already there, with seats pre-assigned and the seating chart posted on the teacher's desk. Her seat was in the fifth row.

Class 1 had forty-nine students, with desks arranged in seven columns separated by aisles. There were no desk partners. Chu Tingwu sat next to the wall, with Chang Yile on her other side, and Chang Yixin sat behind her sister.

An Shiyan sat in the second row, some distance away from them.

Once everyone had arrived, Teacher Yuan tapped the desk and said, "I'm your homeroom teacher and mathematics teacher. Let me introduce myself, though I've basically memorized all your faces already. Now that military training is over, everyone needs to focus. I won't waste time with speeches - let's first arrange the class monitor and subject representatives, then they can help collect the textbooks."

The subject representatives were directly appointed based on grades, with the understanding that they could be replaced if they didn't perform well. Of course, Teacher Yuan said she would consider volunteers too.

Chang Yixin became class monitor, Chu Tingwu was appointed English subject representative, An Shiyan became the Chinese subject representative, and Tang Zhe was made the Physical Education representative.

They spent the morning distributing books and then started classes immediately. Nine periods were scheduled for the day, with the last period marked as self-study.

However, when the time came, Teacher Yuan entered the room and had everyone pass around club application forms.

"Our school has many clubs, but joining isn't mandatory. You can join if you want to, but don't let clubs affect your studies or skip classes," she said, leaning on the desk. "See that Comprehensive Arts Building over there? The senior club members will be there to explain membership requirements. You can go take a look now - but keep your voices down when leaving, the seniors are still in class."

Everyone cheered quietly.

For high school students, any chance to leave the classroom during class time was like a mini vacation!

Chang Yile held Chu Tingwu's hand and reached for An Shiyan, while Chang Yixin joined them without prompting. The four left the classroom together, and An Shiyan whispered, "Did Teacher Yuan say if we could start our own club?"

Chu Tingwu replied, "We'll have to wait for the results of our proposal."

The chances of success... were actually quite high.

Because the system had intervened.

Or rather, because the principal had seen "parental" support: the system had contacted the school in the name of a student's parent, asking if they could adopt the female peacock from the cafeteria, and mentioned how students had voluntarily proposed a plan to improve the lives of animals in the school's Nature Hall.

So the principal, who had initially planned to reject this idea, reviewed the proposal again and became hesitant.

He thought having students in charge wasn't very reliable.

But although the thick proposal was written in an immature hand, it was feasible.

An Shiyan remarked, "All the boys are going to the basketball and soccer clubs."

It was said that these two clubs could apply to play during holidays, and No. 5 High School's soccer team was quite good, with some athletic students having been selected for the city team.

Since they weren't planning to join other clubs, they just wandered around. The school even had an anime club, where senior students dressed in cosplay were enthusiastically giving speeches at the front of the classroom to recruit members. An Shiyan watched for a while before quietly leaving.

Everyone already knew An Shiyan liked anime - during evening chats during military training, she had recommended her favorite shows and even taught herself graphic design skills to create related items. Those things were called "freebies," items given away free to fellow fans at conventions.

Chang Yile nudged her: "Don't you want to go in and take a look?"

She had mentioned wanting to connect with fellow fans from the same school... "Fellow fans" meant people who liked the same anime or character, right?

An Shiyan replied, "I listened for a while, but I think this club has some issues with financial management."

The club collected activity fees for purchasing cosplay costumes and printing materials, but the finances weren't transparent. Not everyone was interested in the cosplay characters, yet everyone had to pay fees. An Shiyan found this problematic.

She mused thoughtfully, "...Our club can't be like them."

She was using them as an example of what not to do.

Chu Tingwu glanced at An Shiyan -

Although An Shiyan seemed skeptical about "creating a club to adopt animals" in her words, her actions showed she was completely supportive. After completing the proposal, she had researched extensively and was now examining everything with the mindset of an imminent club founder... even more dedicated than the rest of them.

Chu Tingwu smiled, "Yes, our club won't be like that."

They would have their own club.

These freshmen were all excited about running a club. After making a round back to the classroom, Tang Zhe and the others hadn't joined any clubs either - because of the "adoption" plan, Qin Lan hadn't immediately taken the peacock egg to her grandmother's house, thinking it might not receive as meticulous care there as at Chu Tingwu's home. Connected by this single egg, everyone had become close allies, planning to accomplish great things once their club was established.

The principal's hesitation lasted until Friday afternoon, when Teacher Cao called out to Chu Tingwu as she was collecting homework from the office:

"Your 'Nature Hall Animal Adoption Plan' has been approved by the principal. Come to the Dean's office after school to discuss the details - just two people will do, too many won't fit in the office."

Chu Tingwu brought An Shiyan along, and on the way, they learned that their club advisor would be Teacher Cao.

Teacher Cao explained, "Teacher Yuan originally wanted to be the advisor, but she's busy enough being a homeroom teacher."

So he, as her husband, had to step in.

Being a club advisor came with responsibilities, especially for a club that might handle significant funds... Both teachers were putting in their full effort, and everyone silently noted their gratitude.

The discussion indeed centered around financial matters, the frequency of adopters' visits to the school, and various other details - dust motes danced in the sunlight above the desk, and Chu Tingwu waved to Three-Five-Five through the window, just as An Shiyan's voice rose excitedly: "Can we go see the animals now?"

The Dean of Discipline replied, "Yes, here are the keys."

They received the keys to the Nature Hall and a list of the animals, and the caretaker had already been notified.

The two girls bowed to the Dean, then left trying to contain their excitement, deciding to go tomorrow... What tomorrow? It was still early, and it was Friday, so of course they would go today!

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Eight people left the classroom, and An Shiyan looked around carefully before pulling out her phone from her pocket: "I've been carrying my phone just waiting for this day!"

They needed to create new records for the animals, and of course, they would use electronic devices - handwriting would be too slow and easy to lose.

As for quietly doing graphic design and typesetting for business orders and communicating with clients, that was just a side thing, just a side thing.

While still far from the Nature Hall, Chu Tingwu's brows were already furrowed. She pulled out her mask and put it on, silently falling to the back of the group to let others take the lead.

Humans without keen sense of smell hadn't noticed anything wrong. The Nature Hall's lights were on and the keeper was still there, so Chang Yile directly pushed open the door, then suddenly let out an "Eek!"

There was a pile of bird droppings right in front of her.

Chang Yixin's expression was unusually serious: "As everyone knows... birds have a straight intestine, they poop whenever they want."

So when there's one pile on the ground, it means more fresh ones could appear anywhere around at any time. No one wanted to get showered with droppings, so they all crowded at the doorway.

Chu Tingwu: "...I'll go."

Everyone respectfully made way for her.

Then like chicks following a mother hen, they poked their heads out from the doorway:

"Chu Chu, tell us when it's safe to walk."

"Yes, Sister Chu, you scout out the landmines first."

"Since these fall from above, shouldn't we call them missiles?"

"But these missiles appear randomly, so they should be called—"

"Mystery boxes!"

"?"

The Nature Hall was an enclosed indoor venue with a ceiling about seven or eight meters high. As soon as Chu Tingwu entered, she saw a semi-transparent mesh-covered inner hall blocking the entrance, with no visible way to get in.

Through the white mesh, they could see many birds inside, lots of blue and green dots hitting against the mesh. Between the mesh and walls was a corridor, and Chu Tingwu looked up and said: "Come in, there are no birds in this corridor."

So the chicks followed their mother hen, not daring to step ahead of her.

At the end of the corridor after a turn, they could see the door to the simple inner hall, with a sign indicating this was the "Bird House." As soon as they walked in, they found one of the keepers crouching on the ground catching birds.

He was holding a grey-blue parrot, trying to put it back in the Bird House, but the "door" of the Bird House was actually just a mesh curtain. As soon as he lifted the curtain, more parrots ran out, hopping around on the ground.

The keeper turned his head and found himself face to face with several students.

"You..."

Qin Lan waved his hand grandly: "We're taking over this Nature Hall!"

Keeper: "=="

"Oh..." He realized something, "Are you the students who came to help?"

Noticing the communication wasn't going smoothly, Chu Tingwu spoke up: "We're not here to help, we're here for animal adoption. The principal gave us the keys, and the keeper's salary will come from the adoption funds from now on."

The keeper frowned deeply: "What?"

"Anyway," Chu Tingwu raised her hand, "We're going to start recounting the number of animals now and take over this part of the work. Can we begin?"

Keeper: "..."

He actually wanted to object, but Chu Tingwu's demeanor was so confident that it made him feel inexplicably inferior, so he could only mumble an agreement.

While An Shiyan went to talk to the keeper and take notes, the others spread out.

They quickly counted all the animals in the Nature Hall: there were capybaras, guinea pigs (also called Dutch pigs), Angora rabbits, alpacas, small raccoons, white ferrets, and one Yorkshire Terrier dog.

The Bird House was full of budgerigars - in short, there were basically no rare animals.

Tang Zhe played with the Yorkshire Terrier a bit. This type of dog has long fur and a gentle temperament, and it just lay in its small enclosed pen: "Why count a dog too? Couldn't this dog be directly adopted out?"

The keeper walked over: "Nobody wants this dog. This enclosure originally housed peacocks, but the peacocks kept wandering off, so we just kept the dog here too."

How casual...

Almost all the enclosures here were semi-open without tops. Birds frequently flew out, animal smells mixed together, and bird calls chirped incessantly. As they spoke, the keeper picked up another batch of parrots, but when he tried to return them, more flew out - it was an endless cycle.

An Shiyan rubbed his forehead and looked at the messy venue: "This keeper works the day shift, and there's another one for night shift, just two shifts, so they really can't keep up... I think the venue design is also problematic, though at least there's enough feed."

Some animals have stronger odors and sensitive personalities, so they shouldn't really be kept so close to other animals, like the ferrets and guinea pigs. The alpaca enclosure could be semi-open but needs frequent cleaning... basically there were problems everywhere.

Chu Tingwu asked another question: "Does our school have a veterinarian?"

An Shiyan's look answered her: What do you think?

Qin Lan chimed in: "My uncle is a vet. Should we take all the small animals out for checkups?"

Chu Tingwu nodded slowly: "Yes, I think some animals aren't in great condition. It would be better to have a vet come to the park for examinations."

And clearly they hadn't been checked for a long time.

Inside the Nature Hall there was also an office for the keepers to rest. The glass was completely transparent, covered with unidentified animal fur, with bird droppings on the edges. The break room was very basic, with just two desks and a folding bed that looked frequently used.

The vet could work here when they arrived. Qin Lan borrowed An Shiyan's phone to call his uncle, then put down the phone: "I reported all the species and such. Uncle wants to know how many animals total need checking?"

The larger animals were manageable to count, but there were so many parrots it was impossible to count them all, let alone catch each one for examination - what could they do about that?

The keeper silently brought out a disposable raincoat: "You can wear this if you want to enter the Bird House."

To try to avoid attacks from above.

An Shiyan took it, but his fingernail accidentally made a hole in it.

The high school students contemplated this hole for a moment, then Chu Tingwu asked: "Are there no security cameras in the Nature Hall?"

There were security cameras in all four corners, but two were broken and hadn't been replaced. The Bird House had no cameras inside, and it wouldn't be convenient to install any.

It seemed they couldn't sort everything out today. They arranged for Qin Lan's uncle to come to school the next day and headed home with heavy hearts.

Qin Lan went to negotiate prices with his vet uncle and started searching his family group chat for other people - his grandmother's family had quite a few people in animal husbandry, and one uncle-in-law ran a chicken farm. After all, chickens and parrots were both birds, so the difference wasn't that big, right?

An Shiyan created an account and contacted the school website's operator to help get the new account verified. He made calls in his room without his parents knowing, his mood swinging between heavy and excited, as if he could see the animals' lives changing and improving in their hands.

The Chang sisters had held back for many days, and finally brought up the "adoption" matter at the dinner table. Chang Yile pestered their parents to adopt one first: "How about a rabbit? The white ferret is quite cute too. If I had brought my phone I would have taken pictures to show you!"

Their father responded helplessly: "Wait until you show some results, then I'll consider it."

In the current state, they couldn't even take good enough photos of the small animals to trick people into adopting them.

Chang Yixin pondered: "Chu Chu said we could hold offline adoption events, advertise in the city first."

Being able to see their adopted animal in person would reassure the adopters, and once they came to the site, how could they leave without adopting a few? The atmosphere would push them to pay.

On Chu Tingwu's side, the system patted its nonexistent chest, saying it could provide new interior design plans for their venues.

"I adopted that female peacock for you - it can't stay in the cafeteria forever, right?"

The twenty thousand yuan currently in the account was money transferred by the system.

Chu Tingwu: "Since this is work we took on together, not just mine, having you design would be kind of cheating—"

System: "QAQ!"

System: "QAQ, QAQ!"

System: "Q..."

Chu Tingwu: "Alright."

[Hehe!]

System: How is helping cubs cheating! It would cry to death if cubs suddenly became independent and didn't need it anymore!

The system also took over the monitoring of the Natural Science Museum. The museum's surveillance system was quite inconvenient since it was connected to the school's main monitoring system. If anything happened inside, security guards had to call the caretakers, who would then find out what occurred... When the senior student tried to steal the weasel before, it was fortunate that the security guard wasn't slacking off, or the theft might have succeeded.

However, the weasel that senior wanted to steal had already passed away. Weasels don't have very long lifespans, and they hadn't added any new ones to the current group, which consisted only of the offspring from the previous weasels.

While designing, the system searched online for materials, trying to compile the most cost-effective list of renovation materials for the young weasels' enclosure—

Chu Tingwu: "We need to relocate the parrots first and thoroughly clean the aviary."

To move them into cages, they would simply rent a truck full of cages from bird breeders and have them drive it into the school.

She discussed this in a group chat called "Animal Society," and Tang Zhe suggested: "Do you guys ever watch those carpet cleaning videos online? Watching something go from dirty to clean is quite stress-relieving, and the fans are quite loyal—"

"Our renovation of the school's Natural Science Museum is kind of like 'carpet cleaning,' right? Why don't we register a video account and livestream tomorrow's renovation process?"

This would help attract attention for the adoption program and show that their actions were completely transparent, starting from zero—no, from negative—to build up the adoption project.

Chu Tingwu: "Then let my drone do the filming, so we can all focus on cleaning—I'll also promote it on my account."

She did have some fans.

...Actually, she had quite a lot of fans.

When Chu Tingwu started the livestream at the Natural Science Museum's entrance the next morning, her incoming fans were very excited:

[You ghosted us! Didn't you say you'd stream after military training?]

[Grandma, the content creator you followed in your youth is streaming—last time she streamed was last time!]

[Master Chu, your streaming fans' lives matter too! You've ghosted so much that my favorite artist won't even draw fan art of you anymore! She says if you ghost her, she'll ghost you too!]

Chu Tingwu: "...I've been busy and forgot."

Still wearing her mask, she stood as the system controlled the drone hovering in front of her. Chu Tingwu said, "Actually, today's stream isn't mine—it's our club's account, and the main content isn't about me, not about cats or parkour..."

She continued: "Our school keeps many small animals, and we're now preparing to put them up for adoption. My classmates and I created a new account specifically for adoption-related content. The account ID is on the screen, and... I'm ending the stream."

Her "um..." lasted thirty seconds. She had actually posted about this earlier and had streamed briefly on her own account before today to remind those fans who only watched her livestreams.

The screen went dark, and the comment section filled with question marks. Most of the grumpy fans couldn't resist following the new account.

The new account went live.

[It's still you, Master Chu!!]

[Whoa! The angle barely changed, and the background's the same—why bother switching accounts?]

These were fans who hadn't listened carefully and thought Chu Tingwu was just using an alternate account.

The others hadn't appeared on camera yet. It was the weekend, so they quietly watched the stream on their phones while monitoring the comments. They all felt nervous seeing the dense stream of comments and the online viewer count instantly shooting past 30,000.

Chang Yile timidly said: "Everyone seems quite angry?"

But after checking Chu Tingwu's previous streams... this seemed to be her usual style.

In the frame, or rather nearby, Chu Tingwu raised her hand to push the drone.

The screen blurred for a second before completely changing, becoming like an infrared scan with black and white as the main colors, while human bodies showed up in red to represent heat.

Chu Tingwu opened the door and entered the facility, with the drone following behind her. Once inside, it hovered up, bringing the entire facility into view—

But viewers didn't notice the facility's mess first. Instead, in this special visual style, they were first drawn to the dense clusters of red representing life, with different-sized red blocks immediately catching the audience's interest.

[Wow, what's this new streaming content? Looks pretty cool!]

[So this is what you've been working on with the new effects, you're forgiven.]

[At least you're streaming, Cat Lady. Thinking about those other streamers who ghost for months at a time, you're actually pretty good, and the quality is amazing.]

The high school students thought: They forgave her too easily?!

The red faded away as the screen returned to normal, but a light blue control interface appeared around the edges like a game UI. Then, a semi-transparent beam that only viewers could see scanned the entire facility.

The high school students who had followed her in: "..."

They looked at the floating sphere, then at the streaming interface, then back at the sphere: if they were fans, they would forgive Chu Tingwu too.

In any case, it was quite a remarkable viewing experience!

After the scan, bird droppings on the ground, stains on the walls, unreasonable arrangements, and so on... all were marked as issues to be addressed, then listed in the upper right corner.

Rather than "issues," they were more like "tasks."

In the streaming interface, wherever the camera pointed, those unresolved stains would be specially marked, like uncompleted tasks in a game interface. The fans were getting impatient, and even Chang Yile and the others were itching to grab mops and start cleaning.

The caretaker was the same one from yesterday, and he was startled by the high school students' gleaming eyes, muttering in confusion: "What's wrong with them?"

At this point, having captured the audience's interest, the streaming drone moved to Chang Yixin's side.

—Although the system could narrate using an electronic voice, this was the students' own task, and they couldn't rely on the system for streaming effects every time. They needed to let the actual account owner appear and keep the fans engaged.

Chang Yixin, who usually appeared quite composed, was a bit nervous now. She clearly articulated the situation, and with each sentence, the system displayed real-time subtitles and turned the dialogue into small icons stored in the lower right corner.

Like game dialogue, players (viewers) could click to view them.

Since most of the current audience consisted of Chu Tingwu's fans, the several thousand people weren't as unconditionally indulgent with her as they were with Chu Tingwu—the comments raised many practical questions, especially regarding funding.

Fortunately, these were all issues the students had discussed, and as Chang Yixin gradually gained confidence, Chang Yile also chimed in to help. The comments immediately showed responses:

"I can adopt a few, or you could just livestream selling the parrots—I have quite a few parrots at home."

"I found your new account on NewMei, but why isn't there a payment code? How do we send money?"

Chang Yixin: "...We haven't opened adoptions yet. Today's task is to clean the facility, hire veterinarians to examine the animals, record data, and once the renovation is completely finished, we'll open offline adoption events."

Don't be too quick to send money! They're still a new account!

The fans were quite straightforward and even turned to comfort the high school students:

[It's fine, your account has school verification, if there's any problem you can go directly to the school.]

[Even if we get scammed it doesn't matter—getting scammed by a school isn't really getting scammed, it's just paying tuition.]

[By the way, little sister, could you pass a message to Teacher Chu? I've been paying tuition for so long, when will she teach me parkour!]

[It's okay if you don't teach parkour, at least teach cat language! Or do you take commissions? Sister wants to keep a cat recently, Teacher Chu could you help me pick one with good cat morals...]

Teacher Chu: "..."

"Next time, definitely next time."

[Yeah, right!]

Chu Tingwu hadn't decided on a new theme since her last livestream ended, though her follower count continued to grow slowly but steadily thanks to the Fallen Phoenix City promotional video, which had clearly gone viral.

As for choosing a cat... dealing with cat breeders was inevitable, but she hadn't made up her mind yet. However, she could definitely do some educational content about cat language, which she could also share with Teacher Zhang, so the seventy-something-year-old lady wouldn't forget to review her lessons while traveling.

Everyone began cleaning, and the caretaker couldn't slack off with everyone watching. The livestream audience fluctuated around 20,000 viewers, and thanks to the platform's algorithm, it got featured on several recommended spots, bringing in many local viewers.

Chu Tingwu wanted to minimize her influence, not wanting fans to impulsively adopt pets only to regret it later, so she let the other three handle the explanations and questions when new viewers joined.

Then a truck pulled up outside.

It was the breeder they'd arranged to meet, bringing unused cages.

Everyone busied themselves carrying cages in and out. The caretaker, exhausted and trying to sneak away, looked up only to find the livestreaming camera pointed right at him.

The caretaker: "...sigh."

The viewers, safely watching from afar, just kept commenting:

[Honestly, watching people clean is so satisfying! Though it'd be better if we could fast-forward - I get anxious when I see spots they missed!]

[The progress bar for each cleaned section is nice - makes me want to clean something too... If this progress bar was in smart glasses, my mom wouldn't have to nag me about cleaning every day.]

[I'm local, and I kind of want to bring my cleaning supplies over - what you're using isn't getting everything clean—]

[Once this channel takes off, you could do cleaning product promotions! I've already thought of the perfect ad: cleaning products that are pet-friendly, pleasant-smelling, non-irritating, and safe - perfect for pet owners.]

[So which cleaning brand should get the ad spot?]

The chat immediately went off-topic, discussing various cleaning products they'd used.

In just a few minutes, viewers had come up with several revenue streams, amazing the high school students.

Chu Tingwu was used to it by now - this kind of slow-paced stream was fine as long as viewers stayed engaged in chat.

She was transferring the parrots into cages.

As a result, the nature center's door remained open—

Suddenly, the chat erupted.

[Whoa! Cat!]

[Cat cat cat—]

They weren't talking about a person-cat.

The white Persian cat from the school had slipped in!

The cat, probably catching the dogs' scent, hesitated at the entrance, not immediately entering the aviary.

The viewers spotted it, and the system immediately alerted Chu Tingwu. People saw a shadow flash across the corner of the frame—

Verbal commands would be useless now; this Persian cat had always been quite bold, and to them, Chu Tingwu was probably just another "kitten." Usually happy to chat, but with birds everywhere in the air, there was no restraining those eager paws.

So Chu Tingwu instinctively used the moves she'd practiced in last night's dream training session.

She dove forward, rolling half a turn on the ground. Before the Persian cat could react, she had scooped it into her arms. As the cat looked up, there was a "click" - Chu Tingwu had already stuffed it into a cage and locked it.

It was an empty bird cage.

The Persian cat: "Meow meow meow meow?"

Chat: "..."

Chat: "So a human's reaction speed really is seven times faster than a cat's."

Right, person-cat?