Chapter 204 What's the point?
"Did you really put yourself in danger just for a woman?"
"She's not just a woman; she's my mother," I replied to Annaxor, whose face was as intimidating as his words.
"So what? She's still a woman. Do you think she's special?"
Annaxor's words unsettled me a little. Of course, I thought Luciana was special, and even though I had put myself in danger for her, I believed it was worth it. Seeing this annoying demon before me right now felt like a greater sacrifice than the one I had made in the real world. He kept talking to me relentlessly, giving me no chance to rest. From what I had learned, since Annaxor resided within my soul, I couldn't dream like normal people; instead, I was stuck here with him. Thankfully, this only happened during long comatose sleep periods. Honestly, I would rather have nightmares every night than see Annaxor.
"Of course, she's special. Why wouldn't she be? To me, she's a perfect mother."
Annaxor laughed at my words. "There's no such thing as a perfect mother, kid. In fact, there's no such thing as a perfect human. There's no such thing as a good human. Humans are pure evil; the veritable devils are them."
"Oh, I see you've turned into a speciesist now. What's next? Are you going to claim that humans are an inferior race or that demons are the superior kind?"
"You misunderstood me. Every species in this world is alike and shares a common foundation. Humans are evil, yes, but so are other species."
"I don't understand," I said, trying to process Annaxor's words. "If everyone is evil, does goodness hold no meaning in this world? What about sacrifices, love? Are those all lies too?"
Annaxor shook his head mockingly. "Goodness, love, sacrifice... They're all just concepts invented to mask the selfish desires of beings. Even a mother's protection for her child stems from an instinctive selfishness—the drive to preserve her own bloodline and legacy. Humans or demons, it's all the same. The only difference is our forms."
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His words made me uneasy, but they also fueled the anger inside me. "Luciana isn't important to me just because she's of my blood," I said firmly. "She's the woman who raised me, loved me, and did everything for me. Even if her love stems from some selfish instinct, I know it's real. That love is hidden in her sacrifices."
Annaxor's face took on an unusual expression—not contempt, nor mockery, but something contemplative. "Interesting," he finally said. "Maybe you have a point. But that love is still selfish. For instance, if you were a failure or even a terrible person, would your mother still love you? Or if you did something she'd never tolerate—like being a psychopath who takes pleasure in killing infants—would she still love you then?"
His questions forced me into an unwanted train of thought. A small part of me whispered that what he said might make sense. But no, that couldn't be true. "Yes," I said, trying to suppress the hesitation in my voice. "Luciana would love me no matter what. She might be angry at my actions, maybe even disappointed, but her love... it would always be there, and she would try to stop or change me."
Annaxor let out a mocking laugh. "Such a naïve belief! You think love is unconditional, don't you? Humans, even someone like your mother, are beings with limits. Love, as you call it, ends at some point. If you push far enough, even your mother could abandon you."
Having no other option at the moment, I decided to keep talking with this demon. "So, what's your point? What are you trying to tell me?"
"What's the point? We're both stuck here, and I have nothing better to do. As for your question... In my opinion, women are flawed beings. Before the discovery of magic, women were dependent on men. Their weak bodies and the fact that they were almost constantly pregnant made it impossible for them to defend themselves. So, the surviving women found a solution—they began to control men to fulfill their selfish desires. And, naturally, the instinct-driven men accepted this, integrating women into society. This led to the survival of the species and the formation of societies."
"Congratulations, demon. You've just managed to come up with a primitive theory of evolution," I said, but Annaxor ignored my sarcastic remark and continued.
"But women didn't stop there. They had integrated themselves into male-dominated societies, but they were still weaker than even the weakest man. So, to gain more power in the social hierarchy, not content with using only their male partners, they started to use their male children."
Annaxor squinted his eyes and smirked slightly as he continued. "Male children became the perfect tools for them. With their unformed minds, they earned all their mothers' love and attention. But as I said, this love carried entirely selfish motives. Women shaped and controlled their sons to become weapons for their own desires. When these boys grew up, their fear of losing their mother's love made them submit to her manipulations. Also, every boy with a good relationship with his mother harbors a certain desire for her. Most deny it, just like you do. But we both know you want to be with Luciana. Remember, I can see your thoughts, even your wet dreams."
"Wow, so now you're Sigmund Freud, huh? .... What you're saying might be reasonable or at least partially true, but you're forgetting something. Women aren't some secret group ruling the world; this probably happens subconsciously for them. Also, you're ignoring societal norms and moral rules. The concepts of 'good' or 'evil' are things we created. In short, there's no objective, good or evil, but we drew certain moral lines to establish society, and crossing those lines was forbidden. That's how society was born. Basically, you're just criticizing things through the lens of artificial morality while ignoring instincts and evolutionary developments... Damnn, I really just want to wake up now."
Annaxor narrowed his eyes at me, his expression unreadable. "You've raised an interesting point..." Then he looked as if into the distance or the horizon "AnywayOur conversation was quite enjoyable, kid. Let's continue this another time," he said with a grin.Nôv(el)B\\jnn
And at that moment, the darkness began to fade, replaced by a dazzling light. My eyes opened at the sight of a grand chandelier. My whole body ached, yet I felt full of energy. Lowering my head, I noticed a white-haired figure tightly clutching my arm on my right side. I took a deep breath, pulling the blanket off me as I silently wished this white-haired woman was who I thought she was.
Her face was turned toward me, and she held my arm as if afraid I might disappear. Even with her eyes closed and her hair disheveled, her striking beauty was undeniable. Her soft breaths lightly tickled my skin. It was Luciana.
Turning my body slightly, I pulled her closer to hug her tightly. I kissed her silky, fragrant hair, breathing in her scent deeply. Luciana stirred slightly and, realizing I was awake, returned my embrace with more eagerness.
"Little Ethan, you scared me so much..." she whispered. I could feel tears welling up in her eyes
Suddenly, I flipped her over, positioning myself directly above her while distancing myself slightly. Pinning her shoulders to the bed, I stared angrily into her surprised blue eyes.
"Don't you ever think of doing something so stupid again, do you hear me?!"
Luciana's blue eyes locked onto mine, their depth reflecting both shock and sorrow. "Ethan..." she whispered softly. "I'm sorry..." Tears flowed from her eyes drop by drop.
Hearing the sincerity in her words, I sighed and let go, collapsing onto her. As I held her even tighter, I realized that the position we had fallen into carried a level of intimacy that went beyond the typical affection between a mother and son. For a brief moment, Annaxor's words echoed in my mind, and I couldn't deny it anymore. Deep down, I harbored feelings for Luciana that were far from innocent.
And honestly, remembering the sight of her lifeless body tumbling down the stairs slowly, I no longer felt the need to suppress those feelings. In this mortal world, if I truly desired something, I had to claim it. Opportunities wouldn't come to me by chance, nor would everything just fall into place randomly. To me, it was better to take risks and face the outcome than to regret never trying.
So, I decided to stop repressing my feelings and urges. Leaning in to kiss Luciana's full lips, I resolved to take the risk and let my genuine emotions guide me as I kissed her.
The first time I kissed her, I felt like I was in paradise. Her lips, so soft in a way I had not yet experienced, seemed to crush under my lips. Perhaps because of the initial shock, Luciana didn't react at all, which made my job easier. I took her face in my hands and started to kiss her more passionately, but by this time, she had recovered and started to push me away with her arms.
"Ethan, what are you doing?!"