Vaudevillain

Chapter 85: Cave Ins

To Dr. Zlo's surprise, the janitor wasn't dead after the barrage of laser fire. He'd expected something was up when the turrets didn't stop firing but chalked it up to the targeting system. Instead, the lasers burned through the janitor's blue coveralls but couldn't pierce the skin.

"Well, that was unexpected," Dr. Zlo answered as the hacking device finished.

The janitor only stood there, his outfit filled with holes.

"Oh my, he's a fine one," Mabel commented, staring at the janitor's exposed abs.

"No time to ogle, Mabel! There is crime to be done! Get our trap detector to go first, would you?"

"Sure, hon."

Dr. Zlo disabled the gun emplacements while Mabel directed the janitor forward. He made it to the end of the hall, next to the reinforced doors, before another obstacle arrived.

"State your name and designation." A robotic voice spoke from a keypad on the wall.

Dr. Zlo ignored the command, aiming his hacking device at the keypad. In another thirty seconds, the keypad was firmly under Dr. Zlo's control. With a quick press on the hacker, the doors hissed open, revealing the secret laboratory under the Savior School for Mutant Education.

"Hmm. Most curious," someone said.

Dr. Zlo whirled at the noise, bringing his cane up in a defensive stance.

"When combining the latent genome of the Homo Mutatio with the effects of phlebotinium, the genome rapidly undergoes a state of extreme change. Fascinating."

Standing over a table, and so engrossed in a series of specimens under a microscope, was a massive lizardman. Dr. Zlo couldn't tell if the person was male or female from their androgynous body, and their raspy voice didn't leave any hints either. However, they were obviously a scientist of some kind, considering the white lab coat draped across their shoulders. Plus, there were all the test tubes scattered around the desk.

The scientist's scales shone a bright forest green at the head, but the lizard's exposed hands showed earthy brown scales. A tail swooshed around behind, the spotted green scales lifting the lab coat every few seconds as the scientist prattled on. Dr. Zlo saw the end of the tail seemed equipped with some sort of ridges, a line of fangs that sawed at the edge of the lab coat. The lizard grabbed at a test tube and swirled the contents around, twisting their head to each side so each eye could get a good look at the contents.

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In doing so, the scientist took notice of Dr. Zlo and his invading party of ne'er-do-wells. "Be with you in a second," the scientist started, then stopped as they realized who the intruders were. "Ah, villains. I must say, I'm surprised you made it past our defenses. I had a personal hand in designing the contraptions."

"Haha! Nothing is a match to the genius of Dr. Zlo!" jeered the villain. "Simple defenses like lasers and doors are child's play compared to my intellect."

"Mm," the lizard grunted. "Well, I do hope you don't plan on sticking around. I have important experiments to complete, and a fight against villains would take up too much of my time."

"I'm glad you see the futility of fighting. In that case, hand over all the Phlebotinium you have, and I will be on my way."

The lizard paused to set the test tube back in its holder. "You misunderstand," they started. "I have at least twenty experiments on the nature of the mutant genome to finish today, and a fight with some burglar would push back my schedule terribly. But if you insist on this ridiculous notion, The Dino will not hesitate to fight."

Dr. Zlo took a second to scan the room, making sure there weren't others who would interfere at inopportune times. The secret laboratory was one gigantic open area, and Dylan suspected it to be a natural cavern renovated to outfit these heroes. From what he could see, the lab housed three separate floors. Each one built upon a network of metal bars used to reinforce the cavern. Currently, Dr. Zlo stood at the entrance, while The Dino stood two floors up in one of the open rooms.

The lab looked to be the staging area for the hero team living at the school. Some rooms held conference tables, and others had personal effects the heroes carried around. But all of the rooms were built around a helipad situated in the middle of the cavern. A large helicopter emblazoned with a double helix sitting right in the middle.

From what he could confirm, The Dino was the only hero stationed below. For the moment. There was no way to tell if these heroes had some way to call for reinforcements. And Dr. Zlo had stopped hearing the sounds of his distraction ever since he made his way down. Which meant time was of the essence.

"As much as I would love to hold a duel with someone who could match my intellect, I'm afraid I'm on a bit of a tight schedule as well," Dr. Zlo replied. He turned to his mind-controlling companion, "Mabel, would you do the honors?"

Mabel smiled, "Two new fine specimens to dote on me? Zlo hon, you know how to show a girl a good time." The minion turned to the scientist, "Would you be so kind as to lead us to the Phlebotinium?"

The Dino leaned forward, "Fascinating. You seem to have a mechanical construct that induces a state of obedience in some that hear her words. It is unfortunate for you that my unique physiology prevents such control."

"Drat! Cass, Mabel! Deal with this threat while I search for the Phlebotinium, use our trap detector if you have to."

"Boss, I don't know if I can take a hero!" Cass wailed.

"You don't have to take him, Cass. Just keep him distracted while I get what we came for."

Upon hearing Dr. Zlo's commands, The Dino grabbed onto a piece of railing nearby and swung down to land right in front of the villain. "As much as I hate to say it," the hero said as they landed, "divulging your current plan out loud rather ruins its effectiveness, no?"

"Not if you're a genius like I am!" Dr. Zlo gloated. "For all of my plans come to fruition!"

The villain's monocle glowed with light, firing a disintegration beam straight at The Dino's head. The scaled hero ducked, their white lab coat sailing upwards. The Dino's claws gripped into the stone flooring, and the hero propelled forward to swipe at Dr. Zlo's ankles. However, the villain had already activated his rocket boots and blasted off into the sky.

"Enjoy dealing with my creations, The Dino! They'll remind you why man is the dominant species on this planet!"

The Dino turned to chase but was forced to roll to the side as Mabel swung her purse.

"Come now, dear. Play a bit with Momma Mabel," the minion said. "And you," she turned to the janitor, "would you help me stop this scrumptious hero?"

"O-okay," the janitor agreed.

The Dino's eyes widened, "I see you brought a formidable foe. It seems I'll need to get a bit serious."

After speaking, the hero pulled their coat off and laid it to the side, revealing their muscular frame. Mabel whistled in appreciation at the show.

"I don't normally unleash my wild side, you see," The Dino started. "I find it makes me all too feral."

With those words, the hero's eyes changed from the intelligent irises of a scientist to the ravenous pupils of a starved animal; claws, barely more than a few centimeters before, extended to almost finger-sized lengths. The ridges on The Dino's back became more pronounced, the fangs at the end becoming a full set of razor-sharp knives.

"Sorry if there isn't anything left of you afterward," the hero rasped. "This form makes it hard to control my urges."

The Dino lunged toward Mabel, a claw outstretched to tear her apart. Mabel commanded the janitor to step between her and the attack. Cass pulled out his silver tray, the equipment upgraded over the last few weeks.

This silver discus looks almost like the fancy trays butlers use to hold drinks and other objects but has an imperceptibly sharp edge around the rim. Throwing this weapon at the enemy can cause deadly damage to almost anyone. As a plus, butlers can still use it as a drink tray.

Silverplate tray (1)

Razors (15)

Discus (1)

He threw the tray in an arc toward The Dino, grabbing one of his booze grenades after it left his hand. To Cass's surprise, the hero bent back with their head and chomped the tray out of the air while still swiping in Mabel's direction. At the last second, the janitor stepped in front, protecting Mabel even as The Dino's claws raked against his body. Once again, the man took no damage other than his coveralls ripping even more. Mabel could just make out a set of sculpted abs under the body, and she decided then and there to try and take this man for herself.

Since mind control didn't work on the lizardman (and Mabel knew it was a man, she had a knack for these things), she opened her purse and grabbed the pepper spray Zlo had made earlier on. With it in one hand and her bag in the other, Mabel stepped forward to join the others in the fight. She commanded the hunk of a janitor to attack The Dino while keeping her behind him and readied her purse. The sonic weapon built inside hummed to life as she pulled the trigger, unleashing a blast of sound straight at the hero's ears.

The Dino's dynamic vision caught Mabel pulling the trigger, and he ducked under the shot by predicting the arc of travel. The janitor swung an awkward fist at the lizard, which the hero caught with a clawed hand. He yanked the janitor forward, shifting the worker's weight to toss him over his head and into Cass, sneaking around the back. The two collided, sending Cass tumbling to the ground and releasing his hold on the booze grenade.

Mabel fired off another shot from her purse, distracting the hero and keeping him from making a finishing blow. Hissing angrily, The Dino turned his attention to the mimicry of an old woman, claws outstretched. She responded with a blast of pepper spray, forcing the lizardman to jump back to avoid the cloud.

"It's not very nice, going after an old woman like that," Mabel chided.

The Dino rasped a laugh, "We both know there is nothing old about you."

"Well, aren't you a charmer. If you weren't so green, and not trying to kill us, I might have to take you home."

"No thanks, I'm not into anyone younger than I am."

The janitor took another awkward swipe at the hero, who dodged the attack with ease.

"Dear, just tackle the man," Mabel said.

Nodding, the janitor stopped trying to throw punches and instead charged forward, arms open wide to catch the hero in a bear hug. The Dino responded by running at the janitor and sliding under his open legs at the last second. The lizardman tried swiping at the man's legs as he slid under but only succeeded in ripping a piece of fabric off his jeans. Mabel frowned; this lizard was a much tougher customer than she expected. It was a good thing she wasn't looking to do anything other than distract.

While Dr. Zlo's minions fought, Dylan made his way throughout the secret lab. Various unfinished projects sat scattered around the area, which Dr. Zlo ignored in favor of his goal. A part of Dylan wanted to be petty and leave rude notes around the place, but time was of the essence. Any minute now, his distraction could fall through, and heroes would come swarming in.

Dr. Zlo found his prize after the second lap around the area. He had forgotten how small a gram of Phlebotinium actually was, and only remembered once he caught some of the rock glowing in the room The Dino dropped down from. In hindsight, Dylan should have expected there to be Phlebtotinium near the scientist. The NPC had said as much when he came in.

Swiping the container the pieces sat in, Dr. Zlo turned back to his minions and yelled, "Cass, Mabel! I've got what we need! Time to get out of here!"

Dr. Zlo made to fly into the fight and use his smokescreen to sneak away, but a rumbling from above him caused everyone to pause. Looking up, Dr. Zlo saw pieces of the ceiling detach and fall to the ground, some the size of boulders. Then suddenly, like a dam breaking open, the cavern top fell away all at once. Dylan yelled at his minions to find cover inside the chaos and flew over to the room's edge, where it was safer.

As he reached the end of the room, he turned to see his Jacques, a group of heroes, three broken Zlobots, and Quartet falling. He winced as a few of the heroes landed on top of the helicopter blades, breaking their fall with hard metal. The entire group landed in a crash on the floor, kicking up a storm of dust. Dylan blinked at the sight. He hadn't expected his thoughts to come true in such a literal way.