Why Are You So Obsessed With Rejecting Affection?

When I listened to the Grand Duke, I felt as if the strings that had been tangled in my heart were untying.

I felt like I rarely ever felt secure even after struggling alone to build a bunch of defenses to protect myself.

Somehow, my heart was overwhelmed and I couldnt answer right away, so I asked to take a deep breath instead of immediately saying Yes!.

Why do you want to adopt me? A troublesome kid like me

A person who is hungry cannot forget the food they have tasted. Even if you try to forget about those foods, when you reach an obstacle you have to overcome and spend all of your energy, you become hungry for them again.

I am not the only one who loves you.

Oh, well

The Grand Duke looked at what he saw with an increasingly sadder face as if thinking about something.

Dont tell me, has no one ever loved him openly and honestly? What about your parents? The Grand Duchess?

Why is he like that? Why should a man as friendly as the Grand Duke have such a sullen face?

I felt a little sad and clenched my fists.

Is it true that you have no desire to return to your family?

The Grand Duke asked me with a more serious face.

It seemed that he was trying to make sure that I was not hesitating because I missed my family.

I hate them. They are not my family.

They are people who left me without looking for me.

People who never believed in me.

Because they hated me?

Or because of the empress?

Maybe there is something wrong with them.

But I didnt want to understand their circumstances.

Whatever their reasons, it wouldnt change the fact that I was living a miserable life thanks to them.

They wouldnt understand a young and fragile orphan girl like me.

The Imperial Rulers, or my Imperial Brother, neither protected me.

Rather than protecting me, they only loved Azuela.

Anyway, this is the world in the book. It is a world that is only kind to the main character, Azuela.

That fact will not change.

Have you ever met them in person?

No

I shook my head.

If I am actually the princess, why was I living like that?

I had no intention of regaining my status.

I am very worried if I am a real princess.

There was no reason for my family members to appear, and even if they appeared now, it would be an envoy of servants sent to retrieve me.

Hmm

Grand Duke seemed a little surprised by my unenthusiastic reaction that I now showed for the first time.

I thought I had to soothe my mind and forget my grudges, but when the dam in my heart that I had used to suppress everything broke, I couldnt restrain myself.

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My Dad who drove me to my death without even knowing that I was his daughter.

A brother, who treated me coldly, and would tell me to prove that I was his real sister.

An Empress who took everything away from me while aiming for my ability.

And a sister, who received all the love they had to give, was the part that upset me the most.

None of these people could be my family.

I dont have any family. I am just an orphan.

The Grand Duke kneeled down on the floor, while he held my hand tightly, and said in a kind voice.

I, me, and my children will be your new family. I will make sure that no one can harm you, so lets live together.

Then he hugged me in his arms.

The tears I tried to hold back burst out when I was held in his comforting arms.

There are so many more wounds on your heart than I thought, when will they all be healed

The Grand Duke muttered quietly while he continued to soothingly pat my back.

I just dont worry too much

Okay. Then, I hope you will become my father.

I want to live happily together.

I will definitely pay you back in the future. I know I owe so many things to you right now.

I held the hand of the Grand Duke and said earnestly. Somehow, I started to cry even harder than before.

The Grand Duke hugged me and said.

Shushu, children dont owe their parents.

The hug was very tight, it was as if he was saying that hes sorry.

Really.

Shuelinas birth family didnt think like this.

But now my father is the Grand Duke and not anyone else. These were the only people I wanted to call dad and brother.

Things that were important to my original family were irrelevant here.

With or without spirit power, with or without use, with or without good blood.

Do you really love me?

So, then, are you going to keep loving me from now on?

I asked, holding the Grand Duke shirt tightly.

Shushu!

Dont keep asking for something so natural!

During the moment that I was waiting for the answer from the Grand Duke, the children suddenly burst into the room with the loud thumping sounds of their hurried feet.

Wyndert and Deleign ran toward me and the Grand Duke with facial expressions they had never shown me before.

Are you really going to be my little sister?

Shushu is gonna be my little sister!

The brothers just hugged me tightly and I felt like my neck was going to break while they were squeezing me.

Im so happy!

Good idea! I would be worried if you disappeared and left..!

The interior of the room quickly became loud and chaotic.

The two brothers who were curious about where I and the Grand Duke were going seemed to have followed after us.

They praised me, stroked my head and back, and laughed as if they were going to cry at any moment.

Between the sounds of the loud shouts, the Grand Duke stomped the floor with one foot.

Quiet! Talk calmly!

But father! Shushu is!

Like his happiness was out of control, Deleign laughed and cried out.

Shushu is not getting upset.

Wyndert nudged his brothers body to tell him to quickly shut his mouth. Then, he adjusted his body so he could meet my eye level and look at my face clearly.

Thank you.

Big brother Wyndy.

You taught me how fun and happy it is to love people and play with them.

Wynderts eyes softened slowly and gently. As if he is completely and honestly happy. He has only ever received awe and public attention from others. Without meeting a single person who actually loves him. Then he met someone who looked at him with a warm heart for the first time.

Just as I was the first person to care for them in this house, they were the first to care for me. Enjoying each others company, talking about love, and hugging each other. It was also the first time for Windert to experience those things.

Lets be together forever, Shushu. We were supposed to protect you. Please protect my happiness too.

I looked at Wyndert quietly, and the Grand Duke gently touched my cheek.

I realized that just as I was tamed by them, they were tamed by me, too.

Yes.

I nodded.

My new big family.

I was so happy I would never lose it again.

***

Im so happy.

Are there any words that better explain this present than the words a life full of love? The reason I was sent into this ridiculous novel was all for today.

I grabbed Wynderts and Deleigns hands and whispered while heading to my room.

I dont want to separate yet

Standing in front of my bedroom door, I hesitated.

But you have to sleep, Shushu.

Wyndert whispered as he opened the door.

With regret, I looked at the faces of Wyndert, Deleign, and the Grand Duke in turn.

I cant bother them anymore.

Lucy helped me change my clothes so I could go to bed.

I was grateful enough that they deliberately waited in front of my dressing room so that they could tell me goodnight.

I dont think Im going to sleep very well with all the excitement.

I thought so, but I agreed to go to sleep because I didnt want to cause any trouble on the first day for my new family.

Then can you watch me until I sleep?

I asked, looking up at the Grand Duke.

Am I asking for too much? I didnt want to constantly be thinking of what I should do to be loved anymore.

Do you want me to read you a fairytale?

The Grand Duke asked as he headed to the bookshelf on one side of my room. He spent a long time contemplating in front of the bookshelf before picking up a book.

Is this the situation where my dad is going to read me a book, right now?

Today was the best day of my life.

I nodded with a happy face.

Both of you go and sleep.

I want to watch Shushu until she falls asleep .

Deleign grumbled and protested. However, the Grand Duke did not yield.

I admired the happy atmosphere knowing that we could always be together, hug each other, and share our affection.

Its time to fall asleep in this chaotic atmosphere.

I decided to be satisfied with the Grand Duke putting me to sleep.

In fact, everyones schedule is on the tight side, and I didnt want to see my brothers overwork themselves because of me.

Oraboni, see you tomorrow.

(T/N: Oraboni is a formal Korean term for big brother used by younger sisters. From now on, I will use this term whenever Shuelina calls her brothers.)

I waved my hands goodnight to Wyndert and Deleign.

Then the brothers gave up after realizing that the Grand Duke would never change his mind.

Sleep well and see you tomorrow, Shushu.

Lets meet tomorrow!

As the two of them went out with a downcast mood, the Grand Duke gently scooted me over so that he could sit on the edge of the bed.

Now lay down.

I was wearing those white pajamas. The ones I wore on the day I caused a big fuss with the Grand Duke and the soup.

Because of the memories from that day, it was my favorite set of pajamas, more than any of the others.

Did the Grand Duke notice?

I glanced at the Grand Duke.

The Grand Duke slightly raised his eyebrows, which signaled to me that he did indeed notice, and muttered a little, saying, Those are pretty.

You must have noticed!

I thought the Grand Duke was an oblivious person. I became a little happier thanks to the perceptive eye of the Grand Duke.

He laid my body straight on the bed. At the same time, he subconsciously gave a warm smile.

The fairy tale I will read today is about the wizard in the tower.

After arranging the duvet so that I was tucked in well, the Grand Duke opened the book.

The book was based on the Dungle Forest. It was a story about a great mountain wizard who lived in a tower in the forest.

So the wizard grabbed the vine and went down.

Honestly, I didnt really listen to the contents of the fairy tale. I focused on the appearance of the Grand Duke, who was reading the story with a very sincere and clear voice.

One hand was comfortingly patting my chest to a certain beat while he was flipping through the book with the other.

He changed his voice and way of speaking to try and match the characters, but his eyes frowned because it didnt go as well as he hoped.

He was just like the father I had always dreamed of having.

There were tons of flower fields underneath the tower that he had constantly dreamed of.

I really like the Grand Duke. Im really happy I get to live with the Grand Duke.

The wizard rolled around like a puppy on the flower field. Shushu, have you ever seen a puppy?

I wanted to reach out and grab the hand of the Grand Duke that was patting my chest. But before that, sleepiness caught up to me first.

Oh, you fell asleep.

As I heard the voice of the Grand Duke, I fell asleep immediately.